INSTANT EXPERTS - the latest news, explained by idiots

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In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons...
The Honk is back from gallivanting and it’s all happening!: 
Trump’s little off-the-shoulder number wows the crowd at the Met Gala, while Cole Allen’s little shoulder-holster number wows the Secret Service at The White House Correspondents’ Dinner!
It’s hard times in Australia cos it’s Budget night, while it's hard times at The Cock Inn, Cockfosters cos it’s Saturday night!
UK Conservative Leader Kemi Badenoch promises free ass exam to every antisemite in Britain!  
And in sport, Wests Tigers lose 500-0 to the combined powers of Yomif Kejelcha, Larry Doby and Buzz Aldrin!
And so much more in the show even Olivier Rousteing & Beyonce say "can be a little bit over the top": 
Aussie PM Anthony Albanese and Treasurer Jim Chalmers schedule electoral gangbang for next Tuesday as their Budget f*cks every single Australian at the same time! 
Moronic Aussie Jew-hater arrested outside Antisemitism Royal Commission: "The cops have promised me a bunch of free proctology!"  
Epstein suicide note released: “Hey stupid! This is the tip, not the iceberg!” 
FBI comments on Kash Patel college arrests for public urination: "Now he does it in his pants in the office!"
And living corpse Rudy Giuliani at death’s door - til Death said: “I think you may be looking for Four Seasons Total Landscaping?” 
It’s another bumper episode of Instant Experts, in which we comb our Barnet Fair, get some geography To Go and Henry lends King Charles his car parked in Belfast! 
In the comedy podcast with all the latest news, explained by idiots - The Honk and Henry Lee. (Ian Minus, 68, of Killarney Heights, held up (by cop's fist, in the air).

Say hi to us by email at: [email protected]
Or be heard everywhere from The Bishop’s Finger to The Knob with a voicemail to play on the show, right from our home page: www.instantexperts.com.au 
Or if urgent in Melbourne just call us on 000 and we’ll answer within 17 hours!
All complaints to: Zack Polanski, no relation to Roman, but still a c*nt. 

Audio produced, mixed and compiled by Junior - thank you! 
Video designed, compiled and edited by The Guantanamo Babe - chef's kiss! 
Episode edited by Honk, with assistance from 'Lauren' Dirty Sanchez wearing fashion forward underpants on head, and Iris Van Herpes (working remotely)
Digital design & social media by Guantanamo Babe
To see RFK Jr. ditching his wife at The White House Correspondents' Dinner:
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DXmcNiegMXC/?igsh=MWR0bjd2YnB4ZWdlNQ==
The Honk dressed for Met Gala by Anglicare Op Shop, Mt Druitt
Henry Lee dressed for armed resistance against British by Quartermaster, Real IRA

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For the video version: https://youtu.be/ezdw85RbZT0?si=IYR0VDEmptifK9FY
In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits & Morons...
Trumpy’s on a brain break and The Three Stooges take over!:
Larry Stooge, BJ Vance, gives his long-awaited lecture on Catholicism to the Pope!
Curly Stooge, Ka$h Patel, explains serial drunkenness is “part of the job mate, I love you maate, mate I love yez all!”
And Moe’s Tavern Stooge, Pete Hegseth, freestyles some Bible verses about death, destruction and serial cheating!
Plus so much more on the show Leo XIV calls "stupri bonum!":
We explain the difference between Just War and just war!
It’s 'Fangs for Nothing' as Captain Cook meets Dracula in our much anticipated short history of Whitby!
And, it’s a great day for Depressed Tigers Fan(s) as our boys beat The Raiders AND The Ref, to win Wrestlemania!!
In another bumper episode of Instant Experts -- in which the Trump Administration courts Sugar Daddies, spills nuclear secrets, shags the help and, shockingly, appoints someone qualified for their job! 
It's the comedy podcast with all the latest news, explained by idiots - The Honk & Henry Lee (LaFarge CEO Majeur LeConte stuck in Gaza City Council meet re: new Hamas tunnel plans) 
Say hi to us by email at: [email protected]
Or be heard everywhere from Sao Paolo to a shopping bag near you, with a voicemail to play on the show, right from our home page!: www.instantexperts.com.au  
All complaints to: [email protected]               Sorry, [email protected]
Or just pop on the bear suit and scratch up our car!
For The Poodle Room's very manly chairs: https://www.fontainebleaulasvegas.com/poodle-room/
For Info Wars' Alex Jones being definitely not insane: https://www.instagram.com/reel/DXZo12vCfdM/?igsh=NWZmamZ4dnpjdjF5
Foolproof bear suit/paws are here: https://fortune.com/2026/04/18/insurance-claim-scam-damage-luxury-cars-human-bear-suit/
Audio produced, mixed, compiled and mastered by Junior
Video designed, compiled and edited by the Guantanamo Babe
Digital design and social media by Guantanamo Babe
Episode edited by Honk, with intermittent assistance from Cody Rhodes' one good eyeball and “Shirtless” Alex Jones
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For Video version: https://youtu.be/-LOg8hT60OY
In this tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons:  It's Iran week 7 PLUS the match-up the whole world's waiting for! 
In the white robed corner, from Chicago, Illinois, weighing in at 164 pounds, it’s Tarantino Chapter 4, Verse 7 as “the path of the orange cuck is beset on all sides by the baddest muthaf*ckin' Pope on the planet!” - LEO X-I-V!
In the red tie corner, weighing in at 943 Quarter Pounders, from New York, New York, it's the dump in the trunk that’s giving us goose bumps - DONALD J TRUMP!!
And in the orange and black corner, weighed down by the hopes of tragic supporters, it’s the top-of-the-table, 3-time wooden spooners - THE WESTS TIGERS!!!
We preview that cage match death battle, the best of Iran, the chiseled-in-stone bits of the Bible & so much more in the show critics say "inexplicably just got nominated for an actual award": 
Honk sails the seven seas on The Love Boat - Gabon edition! 
Zelenskyy asks JD Vance to schedule urgent BJ Vance w Putin!
Magyar Health Minister joins Naughty Nurses and Horny Corporals for new version of “Hungary Eyes”!
As Rory McIlroy serves his Masters rivals a Wagyu sh*t sandwich!
Plus Trump plays Jesus, Iran turns Catholic and Jesus calls for a doctor, all in another bumper episode of INSTANT EXPERTS, the comedy podcast with all the latest news, explained by idiots - Honk & Henry Lee (Gov. Jeff Landry trying to seal Calvin Duncan in Ark of the Covenant, AZ, with help of Top Men)
What the hell is going on? We don't know either! But that won't stop us sharing even more deep insights, like:
Melania Knauss denies ties to Donald Trump: “I only ever met him through Jeffrey Epstein”
Artemis II names Surprise Astronaut of The Week: The Junkyard Dog!
Essendon fans get drunk, laid, win lotto all in one beautiful Saturday arvo!
For Trump AI Jesus video: https://x.com/magacult2/status/2044090944572502197?s=46
Dancin' Hungarian MP video: https://www.instagram.com/reels/DXEX5V2jMBG/
Sh*thouse Russian drone demo: https://www.instagram.com/reels/DWCmt5nknG-/
Artemis II WWE in space: https://www.instagram.com/reels/DW6seQoDLLK/
Say hi to us by email at: [email protected]
Or be heard everywhere from Nonthaburi to Miami with a voicemail to play on the show, right from our home page: www.instantexperts.com.au 
All complaints to: [email protected] 
Audio produced, mixed by Junior - saved our butt! 
Video compile, edit, design: Guantanamo Babe
Episode edited by Honk, with assistance from Drs Pezeshkian, Trump, and Alex Twal
Digital design / socials: Guantanamo Babe
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Video version is here!: https://youtu.be/ufDZGSXjGAg?si=aJOc-suBivy6JQsf
In this tour of the world's crooks, f*ckwits and morons...
It’s Iran week 6 and we’re all going back to the Stone Age! Or Golden Age! Or both!:
Trump’s 15 point peace plan offers Iran the money, the box, the nukes, The Strait and a Tesla with Everything Computer! 
Meanwhile, Iran’s 10 point peace plan is Farsi for “Noted”
In sport, Henry slams a 6-pack of Chateau Lafitte Rothschild as the Tigers beat the Eels, while Honk enjoy a glass of 2026 milk backstage with The Wiggles!
Plus so much more in another bumper episode of INSTANT EXPERTS, in which the Ayatollah doomscrolls Truth Social from his backpacker hostel in Vilnius, while Ben Roberts-Smith creates the best-behaved prison in Australia! Also:
The Financial Times issues apology to The White House: “to clarify, it’s in its ‘f*ckIN’ phase not its ‘f*ckING' phase”
Pakistan PM Shehbaz Sharif likes INXS’s Shabooh Shoobah but tweets he'd “rather listen to Kick” 
Donald Trump hails Operation Midnight Pounding a huge success: "I blew holes in Iran so deep those guys'll never forget me!" 
From The Masters' Menu to the Avignon Papacy, we got you covered!
In the comedy podcast with all the latest news, explained by idiots - The Honk & Henry Lee (Pete Hegseth delayed by Pentagon Vindaloo)
Say hi to us by email at: [email protected]
Or be heard everywhere from Pyongyang to Chungcheong with a voicemail to play on the show, right from our home page: www.instantexperts.com.au 
All complaints to: [email protected]
Audio produced, compiled and mixed by Junior 
Video designed, compiled and edited by the Guantanamo Babe
Episode edited by Honk with intermittent assistance from Chris and Rich Robinson and occasional interference by Stifler’s Mom 
Digital design & social media by Guantanamo Babe
For Pope Leo and Harlem Globetrotters vision, go here: https://www.instagram.com/reel/DW4BbDJCF11/?igsh=c3N6d2Z6Y2h1OW5r
“Balalala Lumumba” proudly performed by King Leo & The Walloons. Don't miss the boys when they finally appear live at The Hague: the wait since 1960 is almost over! 
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Video version of ep is here! https://youtu.be/63_tWTAjsuA
In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons:
It’s Iran week 5 and the Distract-O-Meter hits 11 as another Friend of the Show departs!
US Attorney-General Pam Bondi is boned to distract from Iran, which was supposed to distract from The Epstein Files, that we admit Our Pam f*cked up monumentally, but it’s hard when the President is guilty as fark!
'Pam Bondi: Worse Lawyer or Worse Person?' AG of Hell decides!
Pam retorts: “Better to die on your feet than work on your knees! But you’re still the best President since [muffled, unintelligble]” 
And so much more in another bumper episode of Instant Experts - in which the US wargames how to open thing that was open before and Donald Trump fumbles around trying to find The Strait of Clitorz!:
The Dow goes down like BJ Vance at a Cabinet meeting, hitting 46,000 and falling
Trump celebrates Easter, Jesus’ message of sacrifice and love by bombing the sh*t out of some Muzzies
Davey the Escape Goat wishes The Lord was his Shepherd instead of “Pedro the Lonely”, after dark
Plus, Teresa the co-ed proves Hell is exothermic, the hard way!
Then the hits keep coming like the Crowes in the ‘90s, Stones in ‘73:
Aussie PM Anthony Albanese addresses the nation but forgets the postcode, envelope, letter and stamp
Donald Trump addresses his nation, shouting “Person Woman Man Camera TV!” sorry, “Iran Vietnam Afghanistan Covfefe!”
US Def Sec Pete Hegseth sacks Chief of The Army for refusing his stupid orders, then sacks his stockbroker for acting on them
And Wests Tigers beat Jonathan the Giant Tortoise in a thriller!

In the comedy podcast with all the latest news, explained by idiots - The Honk and Henry Lee. (Geoff Provest MP (Nat, NSW) in mandatory online security course led by Ihaq Duhmquns Aqawntz, IRGC, Tehran)

Say hi to us by email at [email protected]

Or be heard everywhere from St Bart’s to Saint Helena with a voicemail to play on the show, right from our home page: www.instantexperts.com.au 

All complaints to [email protected]

Audio produced, compiled, re-mixed and mastered by Junior

Video assembled, edited, and designed by the Guantanamo Babe

Episode edited by Honk with assistance from Buffy the Wombat and twins, absolutely no assistance from Telstra who suck c*cks

Digital design & social media by Guantanamo Babe. You rock!
Watch or Listen anywhere! https://linktr.ee/instantexpertspodcast
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