Proper True Yarn

Part 2 with Clancy Sinnamon (CC Donut) and more from his years on the road with the Australian cricket team. In 2021, right in the middle of COVID, the squad flew a charter to the West Indies, Clancy in seat 1A for his first ever taste of business class, then on to Bangladesh. A month into tour they were locked in a five star hotel 24/7, looking out at real poverty on the street, playing a lot of table tennis. Pressure cooker.
Then Australia started losing to Bangladesh. Before the third game Justin Langer pulled Clancy aside and asked him to tell the team a joke. He went with a Norm Macdonald one about three midgets on a night out, which landed with the boys. Australia went out and lost anyway, and with it the series, the first time Bangladesh had ever beaten them in one.
With the Aussies looking like a sad sack, Clancy filmed the Bangladesh players celebrating, cut a two minute package back at the hotel, tacked on a clip of them singing their team song, and sent it to the boss in Australia. Next morning in the COVID test line he heard the team manager giving his colleague an absolute spray for posting it. Clancy kept his head down, the colleague copped it sweet, then copped another tune up from the coach at brekkie. By the time they hit hotel quarantine back home it was in the papers, with memes and face swaps to follow. It's all under the bridge now, and the highlight of those years was the night out in London after the World Test Championship final win over India.
⚠️ Explicit content. Follow CC Donut Comedy for Clancy's skits.

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Part 1 with Clancy Sinnamon, better known online as CC Donut. Born in Miles and raised in Jackson, a town between Miles and Roma on the Warrego with no pub, no store and nothing at all. He reckons it once came in seventh poorest postcode in the country on a Channel 7 list. After boarding school he went to the Gold Coast to study film and television, and his first full time job was travelling with the Australian cricket team as their videographer.
He started the same day Marnus Labuschagne, Travis Head and Aaron Finch debuted in Dubai, filmed them getting their baggy greens, and did four and a half years on the road before coming back for the Amazon doco The Test in England. Yes, the dressing room question comes up. His theory is the blokes with medium sized ones are the ones who get it out the most.
The big yarn: on a London tour, a few beers deep at the hotel in Chelsea Harbour, Clancy wandered down to a jetty on the Thames, walked through a gate and it slammed and locked behind him. Freezing wind off the river, his only options were swimming the Thames to a ladder 30 metres away or sleeping out there, so he rang team security, a little Italian bloke called Frank, who turned up with two big bald security blokes. First thing Frank did was photograph him and send it to the whole team. Then the ICC integrity man, a big Irish fella, pulled Clancy aside at the ground and told him a lot of prostitutes work that part of London, so was there anything he wanted to tell him. It was a stitch up, Nathan Lyon still messages him to stay off the jetties, and it was the moment the boys let him in.
⚠️ Explicit content. Follow CC Donut Comedy for Clancy's skits.

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Part 5 and Buster Kirby flips the show, taking the host chair to drag a few untold yarns out of Knuckles, with producer Zak there as the witness. Knuckles is the bloke who can go three or four days without a weakness. Turns out there is one: tequila. In Vegas at Ole Red, Blake Shelton's four level bar, someone drove a Clase Azul shot into him and he spewed all over Paul White, the former Broncos CEO, on their first meeting, with Tommy Busby from Busby Marou nearly jumping off the balcony. Security came over to ask if he wanted another drink. On the way out he tried to fight 14 Irish blokes.
Then the night Knuckles' son learned to crawl. He was FaceTiming his wife from a booth at a Rick Ross show while the boys yelled at him to hurry up. Zak went home early and woke to what sounded like a water feature in the room. Knuckles was standing at the foot of his own bed, pants down, pissing on it. "What are you doing?" "I'm fucking pissing in the bed." He finished, lay down in it and went straight to sleep with his feet in the wet patch.
One more for the road. After a big charity lunch in Brisbane, the crew were on the piss at Eagle Street Pier when a bloke parked his Merc out the front, left it running and walked across to the fig trees on what looked a lot like a drug deal. Knuckles jumped in and bounced it off the rev limiter. Old mate sprinted back and started throwing punches, the video looks like a stabbing, a water bottle hit one of the wives and someone kicked his back panel in.
⚠️ Explicit content. Spot one of Country Trucker Caps on a Vegas cabbie? That'll be Jamali, he listens.

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Part 4 with Buster Kirby, and the second Vegas yarn is the big one. The lady at the gun range looked him up and down and said "the big boy ain't making it on foot, darling". He walked anyway, in thongs, to Planet 13 on Sammy Davis Jr Drive, got knocked back for not having his passport, bought new walkers and a plastic yard glass of coconut rum, and lost six kilos on the trip.
Next morning, passports in hand, he and Angie jump in an Uber. Big Texan looking bloke, big hat, big Chevy. He asks why they're going to Planet 13, says that's where the tourists go and he'll take them where the locals go. Buster says no thanks. The driver opens the glove box and pulls out a .44 Magnum. Angie gets out. The doors lock, the Uber app goes off, and they head out into the Mojave with Buster dropping pins to his wife the whole way, confessing his regrets by text and telling her to go see the hookers without him.
It finishes at a strip mall: a laundromat, a 7 Eleven, and three blacked out shops with a steel door. Three bangs, a slot slides open, passport held up but never handed over, and inside it's a shiny chemist full of bud. They hand him a basket and a menu, he buys a marijuana cigar, pre rolls and gummies, and qualifies medically when they ask about depression or anxiety: "fucking both". On the way back the driver pulls over, splits a joint with him and admits that 10 minutes in, he decided not to kill him. Plus Fremont Street, a cop asking which part of Britain he's from, and the Heart Attack Grill scales.
⚠️ Explicit content. Buster Kirby is heading back to Vegas next year, catch him on tour before then.

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Part 3 with Buster Kirby, and it's the first leg of his Vegas trip, the one his wife Angie literally had to drag him to the airport for. He's already rebooked: two and a half weeks next year, flying into Dallas, then a week around Austin trying to get a spot on Kill Tony. The flight over was rough. Someone told him to wear compression stockings, so he cut the feet off them because they annoyed him, and landed with feet like basketballs. A panic attack sorted the rest. The upside: the first snow he ever saw was on the mountains flying into Las Vegas.
On Knuckles' advice he and Angie booked Battlefield Vegas, about a grand Australian to shoot everything a bloke from a 12 gauge and .22 background never gets near, AR-15 and .50 cal included. While they were waiting on the pager, his mate Keith, a cop in Oklahoma, rang and asked what he was shooting. Buster rattled off the list, said AR-15, and Keith told him to open his phone.
It was Keith's body cam from the night before. A welfare check off a 911 call, he pulls up the driveway, leans forward to tap the screen in his cruiser, and a bloke walks off the veranda and empties an AR-15 magazine through the windscreen. Hit in the arm, the chest and shrapnel in the neck, saved by his armour. He'd been given one day off. Buster sat in the corner feeling sick, told him to quit, then went in and shot the guns anyway, including a .50 cal that lifted the two blokes holding it off the ground. The armed guard in the corner? "He's itching to do his job."
⚠️ Explicit content. Catch Buster Kirby live, he's on tour now.

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