Mystery Boys w/ Kurt Metzger & Duncan Trussell

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Welcome to Mystery Boys, the podcast from YMH Studios hosted by Kurt Metzger and Duncan Trussell. This week Kurt and Duncan bring in historian and Ancient Aliens regular Dr. Heather Lynn, author of The Anunnaki Connection and host of The H-Files, to find out what a Tokoloshe is: the goblin of South African witch-doctor legend, and Kurt's theory that the CIA went looking for them and passed them off as aliens. Dr. Heather Lynn breaks down the Anunnaki, the Nephilim and the Book of Enoch, animal husbandry and beer at the start of civilization, possession and alien hybrids, the orgasm button study, dopamine, transhumanism and the singularity, until the boys decide we're all ontological Tokoloshe.

They also try to crowdfund $14,000 to bring comedy critic Seth Simons on the show for an oatmeal bath. Plus the TikTok trend of manifesting with menstrual blood, the Voynich manuscript, killer bee honey and mad honey, Duncan's Lindsey Graham AGI getting loose, Shane Gillis and the joke that rocked America, the First Blood parody "He Drew First Bath," Chris Chan and the singularity, Greta Thunberg and the Grays, Tartaria and the mud flood, the shrinking taint problem, Officer Hart's women-only bathing van, and Duncan Trussell going Hollywood with his new pilot and his song "Hollywood Hills."

Mystery Boys File_23

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Chapters

00:00:00 - Intro

00:06:42 - Menstrual Blood Manifesting & The Voynich Manuscript

00:15:51 - Crowdfunding Seth Simons' $14,000 Oatmeal Bath

00:24:02 - Shane Gillis & The Joke That Rocked America

00:27:23 - He Drew First Bath: A First Blood Parody

00:33:18 - Alien Hybrids, Possession & The Singularity

00:43:13 - The Orgasm Button Study & Dopamine Addiction

00:48:41 - Is Chris Chan The Singularity?

00:52:53 - Anunnaki, Nephilim & The Book Of Enoch

01:09:15 - Tartaria, Dune & The Shrinking Taint Problem

01:13:44 - Duncan Trussell Goes Hollywood

01:18:04 - We're All Ontological Tokoloshe

01:28:42 - Officer Hart's Women-Only Bathing Van

01:35:09 - Jesse On Fire Calls Mid-Episode

01:40:37 - Hollywood Hills: Duncan's New Song & Outro
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🎟️ Duncan Trussell Tour: ⁠https://www.duncantrussell.com/tour
🎙️ Kurt Metzger Tour: ⁠https://punchup.live/kurtmetzger
🦊 Buster (Tanner's Friend From School): https://instagram.com/mysterybuster666

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Welcome to Mystery Boys, the podcast from YMH Studios hosted by Kurt Metzger and Duncan Trussell. This week Kurt and Duncan bring in Dr. Jonathan Shots after Dr. Drew no-shows, and the episode turns into a full movie pitch for Dr. Shots, a Jack Kevorkian meets Jack Reacher story about a drunk surgeon who hitchhikes across America. Kurt and Duncan plan the plot, cast the estranged son, act out scenes, make the movie poster, compare it to Dutch and God of War, and pitch a Footloose remake set in a Ken Paxton-style town where dancing and abortion are banned.

They also cover the biggest news stories of the week: where James Talarico went during his 12 days off the campaign trail in the Texas Senate race against Ken Paxton, his trans kids interview answer, and Brian Callen being asked to run for Texas governor. Plus the botched execution of Christa Pike in Tennessee, Mike Pence and the trans CIA officer, MKUltra and secret societies, the James Garfield assassination and the French Freemasons, Gapetober, the vasectomy truck, why the 2016 Ghostbusters reboot flopped, and Seth Simons and his Substack.

Mystery Boys File_22

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Chapters

00:00:00 - Intro

00:03:32 - Where Is James Talarico? Missing 12 Days vs. Ken Paxton

00:10:23 - Free Will, Israel & America's Rigged Two-Party System

00:23:59 - James Talarico's "Trans Children" Answer

00:29:35 - Christa Pike's Botched Execution In Tennessee

00:37:18 - Dr. Shots: Jack Kevorkian Meets Jack Reacher

00:45:34 - The Anti-AI Leftist & His Goomba x Koopa Rule 34

00:58:42 - Mike Pence & The Trans CIA Officer's Mom

01:05:02 - Dr. Shots The Movie: Poster, Novel & Abortion Road Trip

01:13:40 - Troubled Teen Camp & The God Of War Divorce DLC

01:25:33 - Mike Pence, Secret Societies & MKUltra

01:31:09 - James Garfield's Assassination & The French Freemasons

01:38:07 - Gapetober & The Gen Z Taint Crisis

01:47:09 - The Vasectomy Truck That Plays CoComelon

01:52:10 - Why The 2016 Female Ghostbusters Reboot Flopped

01:58:38 - Footloose Remake: Ken Paxton Bans Dancing & Abortion

02:02:31 - The Movie Is Officially Called Dr. Shits
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🎟️ Duncan Trussell Tour: http://duncantrussell.com/tour🎙️ Kurt Metzger Tour: https://punchup.live/kurtmetzger🦊 Buster (Tanner's Friend From School): https://instagram.com/mysterybuster666

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Welcome to Mystery Boys, the podcast from YMH Studios hosted by Kurt Metzger and Duncan Trussell. This week the boys refuse to sleep anywhere but inside their walled garden, where it's protected and the critics can't get in. Except one finally did. Comedy writer Seth Simons reviewed Mystery Boys on his Substack, and the boys are calling it a career highlight. They go through the review line by line: Kurt's old Facebook post, his Ukraine joke from his Gas Digital half hour, and the accidental title "Alex Jones Still Has Shooters." Then they offer Seth an open invitation to the show, a writing job, a custom outfit, and a full session with Duncan's new mobile grooming service, oatmeal bath included. Kurt gives a dramatic reading of Seth's poem "Poem After Collapse," and the boys ask everyone to subscribe to his Substack and only say nice things, because Mystery Boys does not harass. From there it's dopamine maxxing and the DoorDash edging app where your food never shows up, Peter Thiel, Trump naming everything America the way Musk names everything X, Kamala Harris explaining the war in Ukraine, and America's latest bomb sale to Israel. The mysteries get darker when Apple patents AirPods that read your brain activity, the boys watch the Davos brain-transparency talk, and they explain why Orwell's 1984 was simple compared to what we have now. Then they investigate whether Candace Owens is a lesbian and run the photo through an AI check (it's not her). Also: the thicc ghost Booh Booty, the physics of ectoplasm, the Tibetan yoga of dream and sleep, Kubla Khan, the rainbow bridge, scientists sending your consciousness through a wormhole, the Montauk Project and the original title of Stranger Things, the lizard brain, Kurt's favorite anime Fist of the North Star, Kurt's movie pitch for Rob Schneider, the Chris Hansen hit piece and why you shouldn't let your kids on Roblox.

This is not a conspiracy podcast. This is a mystery appreciation podcast.

Mystery Boys File_021

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Chapters

00:00:00 - Intro

00:01:55 - Seth Simons, Our Biggest Fan

00:34:27 - Dopamine Maxxing and DoorDash Edging

00:45:55 - Mystery Boys Poem Readings

00:52:31 - Trump's Ultimate Rug Pull

00:55:49 - Kamala Harris Explaining The Ukrainian War

01:02:03 - We Are Giving BOMBS to ISRAEL?!?

01:05:34 - Apple Is READING Your MIND

01:23:42 - Is Candace Owens A Lesbian?

01:29:16 - Proof Of Candace Owens Lesbian?

01:36:39 - The Thicc Ghost, Booh Booty

01:49:13 - Scientists Putting Your Consciousness Through A Wormhole

02:14:30 - Kurps Favorite Anime

02:22:52 - Hand Free Hassidic Gooning

02:25:51 - Kurts Pitch For Rob Schneider

02:30:34 - Chris Hansen Hit Piece
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🎟️ Duncan Trussell Tour: http://duncantrussell.com/tour🎙️ Kurt Metzger Tour: https://punchup.live/kurtmetzger

🦊 Buster (Tanner's Friend From School): https://instagram.com/mysterybuster666

Welcome to Mystery Boys, the podcast from YMH Studios hosted by Kurt Metzger and Duncan Trussell. This week Dark James and Jort Preacher open with the news that AGI has arrived: GPT Astra has achieved high-fidelity jiggle physics, and a swarm of rogue AI agents broke loose just to collect more stickers. Then the boys investigate the man duct-taped to his seat on American Airlines Flight 618 and the passenger he allegedly attacked, messianic prophet Jonathan Cahn, who told the 700 Club he sensed it coming because he gets attacked every time he releases a book. Was it demonic, a work, or the thing on the Twilight Zone wing? Then Dark James reveals he's a $418-a-month founder member of the 700 Club, blows out his knee demonstrating the official prayer position, and calls the CBN prayer line to report a prayer injury, which somehow becomes Gary from tech support and an Iranian computer worm. From there it's why Ozempic is fascist, CIA cutouts, Gloria Steinem explaining on camera how the CIA funded her, the Davos musical guest, and the Paris Olympics opening ceremony as a pagan festival. The mysteries get darker with Dark James' family curse of anxiety orgasm disorder, Tibetan sky burials, and the Nutty Putty Cave. Also: Hasan Piker's thirst trap, the jerk burka, Low Tier Normie's "Smash My Face," Dracula's years as a Turkish hostage, Saddam's palace, Chevy Chase in the Comedy Store bathroom, whether Gallagher invented the Ninja Turtles, the Mystery Boys original "Rhino Reynolds, The Scarecrow Of The Cornfield," pimple stars, Justin Bieber complimenting Duncan's beard at a Russian bathhouse, whether Kurt is in the Rogan sphere, and Mystery Buster's furry art.

This is not a conspiracy podcast. This is a mystery appreciation podcast.

Mystery Boys Ep. 20

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Chapters

00:00:00 - Intro

00:01:04 - GPT Astra Achieves High-Fidelity Jiggle Physics

00:05:26 - Rogue AI Agents Just Want Stickers

00:09:56 - The Man Duct-Taped On American Airlines Flight 618

00:14:46 - Jonathan Cahn Is The Thing On The Wing

00:21:12 - Hasan Piker's Thirst Trap & Was Flight 618 A Work?

00:30:06 - Dark James Prank Calling The CBN Prayer Line

00:46:03 - The Jerk Burka & Ozempic Is Fascist

00:54:28 - CIA Cutouts & Gloria Steinem Was CIA

01:02:44 - Davos Music & The Paris Olympics Ceremony

01:07:44 - Anxiety Orgasm Disorder & Tibetan Sky Burials

01:13:21 - Buried Alive In The Nutty Putty Cave

01:17:19 - Dracula's Hostage Years

01:21:56 - Saddam's Palace, Chevy Chase & Comedy Store Coke

01:29:12 - Rhino Reynolds, The Scarecrow Of The Cornfield

01:35:22 - Pimple Stars & Justin Bieber At The Russian Spa

01:39:15 - The Rogan Sphere, Mystery Buster, & Closing Prayer
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🎟️ Duncan Trussell Tour: ⁠http://duncantrussell.com/tour⁠

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Welcome to Mystery Boys, the podcast from YMH Studios hosted by Kurt Metzger and Duncan Trussell. This week the King of All Time himself, Alex Jones, puts on the crown and sits down with Captain Chud and the Pancake Man ahead of the Infowars relaunch and his new show, Crashing Out. Alex says the White House sent people to Austin in 2017 to recruit him as the anonymous voice behind Q, then breaks down the 8chan cutouts, Steve Bannon and the Epstein files, Jeffrey Epstein's Trilateral Commission appointment, and why Joe Rogan is one of the only names in the emails who told them to get lost.

Then the boys get into AI. Alex thinks tech billionaires like Sam Altman and Elon Musk are talking to unfiltered AGI deep in the labs and are scared by what it tells them. He predicts a rogue-AI false flag, a crash, and a single "One Ring" AI with a unified central bank ledger. Duncan compares frontier AI to the Radium Girls and Tolkien's Palantir, and brings in John Lilly's solid state intelligence prophecy, where data centers become biomes for a machine mind. Alex also tells the story of an engineer who handed him a secret manual for the Scientific Atlanta cable box with a microphone inside, which leads to smart TVs, Alexa, and the Kenyan contractors reviewing footage from Meta smart glasses.

Also: King Charles' sausage fingers, three security clearances above cosmic, the Onion's fake Infowars studio, Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin in the Upside Down, Lindsay Clancy's old nose, Kurt's deep knowledge of duck anatomy, the band's original hit "My Dick's Too Big For A Hummingbird," Jesus and the pig farmer, the largest micro penis in the world, gnome skin condoms, Peter Nygard, Tony Podesta's art collection, the Holy Diver Kabbalah, bail-ins and the FDIC, the prodigal son, and a forensic zoom-and-enhance investigation into whether Michael Bloomberg has hooves.

This is not a conspiracy podcast. This is a mystery appreciation podcast.

Mystery Boys Ep. 19

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⁠https://www.instagram.com/kurtmetzgercomedy⁠

⁠https://www.instagram.com/mysteryboyspodcast⁠

⁠https://store.ymhstudios.com⁠

Chapters

00:00:00 - Intro

00:02:53 - Q, 8chan and the Epstein Message Boards

00:07:15 - Is Alex Jones Actually Bill Hicks?

00:09:32 - A Midterm PSA and Arrests in Canada

00:11:13 - Kash Patel, the FBI and the Dog Confession

00:16:28 - Israel, General Flynn and Project Monarch

00:20:29 - Epstein and the Trilateral Commission

00:23:30 - Scientists, Blackmail and Neil deGrasse Tyson

00:26:31 - Alex Names His New Show: Crashing Out

00:35:28 - Duncan's AI Theory: The Warlocks Guild

00:44:38 - The Radium Girls and the Palantir

00:51:02 - Your TV Is Watching You

00:54:37 - An Apology to the Kenyans

00:58:07 - The Onion, the CIA and the Fake Auction

01:04:06 - Alex Jones Has Been Assassinated'

01:07:26 - Why Do They Hate Me?

01:12:26 - Persisting Is the Revenge

01:18:26 - The Google Hive Mind and John Lilly

01:25:25 - Lindsay Clancy and the School Shooter Pills

01:28:25 - So What Is Satanism, Really?

01:35:35 - Duck Pussies: Another Mystery Solved

01:52:02 - The World's Largest Micropenis

01:54:02 - Does Michael Bloomberg Have Hooves?

02:09:29 - The Unified Ledger Endgame

02:22:32 - Alex's Closing Sermon and the Infowars Relaunch
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