Adulting with Autism

What do you do when you're autistic, exhausted, and completely out of emotional bandwidth—with zero fucks left to give?
In this raw solo episode of Adulting with Autism, Auntie April MS, OT/L gets honest about the days when life keeps "life-ing": guests reschedule, kids melt down over school bureaucracy, work drains you, and everything feels like too much at once. She breaks down the lie that life is supposed to feel happy and "high vibe" all the time, and instead offers practical tools for moving through seasons of overwhelm, disappointment, and autistic burnout.
April talks about what to do when your nervous system is fried, why you have to stop taking everything so personally, and how intentional recovery time isn't a luxury for autistic and ADHD adults—it's maintenance. She digs into anger as information, how to find healthy outlets instead of blowing up your relationships, and the difference between temporary shutdowns and giving up on yourself.
In the second half, April shares her own story: failing out of college twice, becoming a nurse, parenting a disabled and autistic child, the death of her mother, divorce, homelessness, health crises, autistic burnout, and watching carefully laid plans (like a dream trip to Seoul) fall apart. Then she connects it to what's possible now: her son's second chance at college, a podcast with millions of downloads, and building a life that still isn't perfect—but is very much not over.
If you've ever felt like life is a dumpster fire and you're too tired to keep going, this episode is for you.
In this episode, you'll learn:
p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> Why "life should be happy all the time" is a harmful lie

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> How to cope when you're overwhelmed, overstimulated, and done

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> Practical ways to create intentional recovery time without guilt

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> How to focus on the next task instead of your entire life at once

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> Why anger is information—and how to channel it safely

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> The difference between a temporary shutdown and giving up

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> How to hold both disappointment and gratitude without gaslighting yourself

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> Why your story isn't over just because your plans fell apart

Summer means a lot of my autistic squad is starting (or escaping) jobs—first jobs after high school, college, or that soul-sucking gig you can't stand anymore.
In this solo episode of Adulting with Autism, Auntie April MS, OT/L breaks down the stuff no one told us about autistic employment: why choosing a job just for the money backfires, how sensory needs and social energy should shape your work, and why your first job is data—not your destiny. You'll hear real-talk about transportation, masking in interviews, accommodations, and how to protect your reputation in a world that loves workplace drama.
We get into saying no without guilt, planning an exit from a toxic job without going scorched earth, and drawing hard lines around dating at work, office "family," and coworkers who will absolutely throw you under the bus. Finally, April talks about mental health non-negotiables, burnout, and why you are never paid enough to tolerate abuse, bigotry, or gaslighting—no matter what your title is.
If you're an autistic or otherwise neurodivergent adult trying to figure out work, boundaries, and survival in messy workplaces, this episode is your field guide.
In this episode, you'll learn:
p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> Why money alone should never be your only reason for choosing a job

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> How sensory needs (noise, smells, chaos) should guide your job search

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> Why your first job is information, not a life sentence

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> Practical interview tips for autistic adults (eye contact, handshakes, masking just enough)

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> What accommodations you can ask for and how to ask

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> How to protect your reputation and say no without over-explaining

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> Why you shouldn't date coworkers or your boss (and how it wrecks your credibility)

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> The truth about burnout, HR, and when a job is costing your mental health

What if you went most of your life thinking you were just "quirky"… and then discovered at 53 that you're autistic?
In this episode of Adulting with Autism, I talk with business and life coach Jonathan Domsky of Untangled Coaching, who works with "nerd diverse" entrepreneurs—people whose brains don't run on default settings and were never meant for the standard playbook. Jonathan shares how supporting his neurodivergent stepson led him to recognize his own autistic traits and finally connect the dots in midlife.
We dig into why so many entrepreneurs are actually neurodivergent, why corporate life often breaks us, and how to design a business and life that actually fits an autistic brain instead of fighting it. Jonathan breaks down his framework of purpose, genius, and environment so listeners can start untangling cluttered expectations and build work that feels authentic, sustainable, and energizing.
If you're an autistic or otherwise neurodivergent adult who feels stuck in a job that doesn't fit—or you've secretly wondered if entrepreneurship might be your real lane—this conversation will give you language, tools, and a new way to see yourself.
In this episode, you'll learn:
p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> Why so many entrepreneurs are ADHD, dyslexic, or otherwise neurodivergent

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> How Jonathan realized he met every trait of level 1 autism at 53

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> What "nerd diverse" means and why default playbooks don't work for our brains

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> The difference between excellence and genius (and why it matters)

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> How to clarify your purpose and design work around your natural strengths

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> Why environment, relationships, and systems must be built to fit you—not the other way around

Listen now to start seeing your "too much" and "too different" as clues to what you were actually born to do.

What happens when autistic kids grow up—and no one is studying their lives?
In this powerful episode of Adulting with Autism, I sit down with science journalist Brady Huggett from The Transmitter to discuss his new podcast series When Autistic Kids Grow Up (releasing Thursday, June 4). Together, we uncover a massive and often overlooked gap in autism research: the lack of funding and support for autistic adults.
While billions have been invested in understanding autistic children, research into adulthood—including health outcomes, lifespan, and quality of life—remains dangerously limited. Brady shares the origin story behind the series, including a groundbreaking paper that exposed how little funding is directed toward adult autism research.
We also explore the real-life impact of this gap—from late diagnoses and co-occurring conditions to a shocking statistic showing autistic individuals may die up to 16 years earlier on average.
This episode is a must-listen for parents, professionals, and neurodivergent adults navigating a system that often stops supporting them after age 18.
In this episode, you'll learn:
p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> Why autism research overwhelmingly focuses on children—not adults

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> The NIH funding gap and what it means for real lives

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> The challenges autistic adults face in healthcare and diagnosis

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> Why late-diagnosed adults are often left without answers

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> The importance of lived experience in shaping research

p]:pt-0 [&>p]:mb-2 [&>p]:my-0"> How media and podcasts can drive awareness and change

🎧 When Autistic Kids Grow Up premieres Thursday, June 4—be sure to follow and listen.

Raymond Lavine joins Adulting With Autism to talk about a topic most people avoid until it becomes a crisis: caregiving and long-term care planning—and why "I'm too young to think about that" is exactly how chaos happens later.
Raymond grew up in Hollywood, California, and spent most of his career in financial services (commercial banking, mortgage banking, insurance). For the past 15+ years, his work has focused on long-term care benefits—what they are, what they aren't, and how to think about them as part of real-life adulthood (not just "nursing homes").
In this conversation, Raymond reframes long-term care as something much broader than many people assume. Caregiving, he explains, is any time one person helps another with daily life—whether that's after an accident, during illness, with cognitive changes, or temporary mobility issues. And crucially: you don't have to be elderly to need caregiving.
Raymond also shares personal stories that make the stakes real: experiencing an unexpected heart attack and the difference preparation can make, plus what it looked like to plan ahead for his wife's knee replacement and hiring a caregiver for the first time. He's candid about his own strengths and limitations—why he's "not caregiving material," why he's "not patient material," and how self-awareness can actually improve outcomes when a family is under pressure.
For neurodivergent adults (and anyone with executive-function challenges), this episode is especially practical: Raymond walks through what information you should have ready (medications, providers, insurance details), why systems beat memory in emergencies, and how a little organization can reduce overwhelm when health situations move fast.
In this episode, you'll hear:
What "caregiving" really means (and why it's bigger than nursing homes)
Why young adults should care: care needs can happen at any age
The difference between planned vs. unexpected health events (knee surgery vs. heart attack)
What happens when there's no plan: chaos, stress, time pressure, and avoidable mistakes
Practical readiness: keeping your med list, providers, and insurance info accessible
Executive-function friendly systems (digital notes, printed summaries, repeatable routines)
Why long-term care plans exist: paying for help at home or in a care setting
Reality check on employer benefits (and what questions to ask at work)
How to communicate with care teams and caregivers with respect (they aren't "the help")
Staying independent longer by using support strategically
Guest: Raymond Lavine
Raymond Lavine is a long-term care benefits advisor with a background in financial services. He helps individuals and organizations understand caregiving risk, cost planning, and long-term care options—so families aren't forced to figure everything out in the middle of an emergency.
Where to find Raymond
Raymond shares resources and contact info on his website: www.lavineltcins.com