Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

Your child is standing in front of a party table loaded with cake, lollies and soft drink. Do you step in or let them go for it?
Justin and Kylie’s answer might surprise you: let the party be the party.
Research suggests that tightly restricting treats can make kids want them even more. Instead of policing every mouthful, this episode explores how parents can help kids build genuine self-control, trust around food and the ability to notice when their body has had enough.
KEY POINTS
Why restricting treats can make them more desirable
The problem with policing what kids eat at parties
Why healthy food habits are built at home, not beside the lolly table
How trust helps kids develop their own self-control
Why parents can decide what food is offered while kids decide whether and how much they eat
How to help kids recognise their body's signals
Why the best teaching moment may come after the party
QUOTE OF THE EPISODE
“The child who is calm around the lolly table got there by being trusted around food when it wasn't a big deal.”
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Fisher and Birch research on restricting children's access to palatable foods
Walter Mischel's Marshmallow Experiment and the 2018 replication study
Ellyn Satter's Division of Responsibility in Feeding
ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
Let parties be parties. One afternoon of cake and lollies isn't going to determine your child's health.
Build everyday habits at home. Offer nutritious options without turning food into a constant battle.
Take the drama out of treats. Avoid making sugary food forbidden, precious or unusually exciting.
Give your child some control. Let them practise deciding how much they want to eat.
Talk afterwards. If they come home feeling sick or uncomfortable, help them connect how they feel with what they ate rather than lecturing them at the party.
Teach body awareness. Help them notice hunger, fullness and how different foods make them feel.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Do you actually know what your child is being taught about gender and identity at school?
Child and adolescent psychologist Clare Rowe says many parents have no idea what is being introduced in classrooms, particularly in the early primary years. She joins Justin to unpack what she believes is a growing gap between what children are being taught and what they are developmentally ready to understand.
They discuss gender identity education, the role of schools versus parents, what Clare is seeing in her psychology practice, and why she believes parents need greater transparency about classroom content.
Most importantly, Clare explains how parents can find out exactly what their school is teaching without starting a fight.
KEY POINTS
Why Clare believes some gender concepts are being introduced too early
The difference between teaching inclusion and introducing complex ideas about identity
Why young children can struggle with abstract concepts
What Clare is seeing among children presenting with gender distress
The concern around moving young people quickly towards medical interventions
Why parents may not know what outside providers are teaching at school
How to ask your school for lesson plans and curriculum information without becoming confrontational
QUOTE OF THE EPISODE
“Get curious, not furious.”
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Clare Rowe and Rowe & Associates Child and Family Psychology
The Rowe Report
On the Couch with Clare
Respectful Relationships programs
Happy Families
ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
Ask your school what your child is being taught about sex, gender and identity.
Request lesson plans, curriculum details and information about any third-party providers.
Find out when this content will be taught so you can talk about it at home.
Approach the school calmly and ask questions before drawing conclusions.
Consider approaching the school with two or three other parents if you feel more comfortable doing it together.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What if trying to create the perfect family moment is the very thing getting in the way?
After a week away with three of their daughters, Kylie realised she’d arrived with a clear picture of how their time together should look. The reality was completely different. And it turned out to be better. Justin and Kylie unpack the pressure parents put on themselves to get the “recipe” right, why our kids need room to make their own choices, and how letting go of control can create more connection.
Justin also shares what happened when Kylie left him juggling work and parenting, including one spectacular diary fail, and why simple, low-pressure time together can be some of the best parenting we do.
KEY POINTS
Why parenting doesn’t come with a guaranteed recipe for happy, successful kids
How expectations can turn good family experiences into disappointments
Why giving kids space can lead to more openness and connection
The power of simple, unstructured time with your child
Why presence, patience and understanding often matter more than elaborate plans - Justin’s lesson in juggling work and parenting when Kylie went away
QUOTE OF THE EPISODE
“It’s the simple stuff that makes our families work the best.”
RESOURCES MENTIONED
What Your Child Needs From You by Justin Coulson
ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
Notice where you’ve created a “recipe” for how family life should look.
Leave room for your child to choose how they experience a moment.
Swap one carefully planned activity for simple time together.
Focus less on monitoring and more on creating a relationship where your child wants to talk to you.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

AI never gets annoyed with you. It rarely pushes back. And it’s very good at telling you exactly what you want to hear.
New research suggests that this constant validation may come with a cost. After just three weeks of interacting with sycophantic AI, people were more likely to seek personal advice from AI and reported feeling less satisfied with their real-world relationships. Many preferred the agreeable AI because it made them feel understood.
Justin and Kylie unpack what this means for kids growing up with AI as a confidant, adviser and sounding board. Real relationships involve disagreement, compromise and uncomfortable conversations. If AI removes that friction, are our kids missing the chance to learn how to handle it?
KEY POINTS
Why AI is designed to feel validating, agreeable and supportive
How constant affirmation can reinforce our existing point of view
Why people may start preferring AI advice to conversations with family and friends
The risk of using AI as a therapist during relationship conflict
Why disagreement and friction are important relationship skills
How parents can help kids use AI without outsourcing their thinking or relationships
QUOTE OF THE EPISODE
“Sycophantic AI is making our human interactions harder and less satisfying.”
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Research paper: Sycophantic AI Makes Human Interaction Feel More Effortful and Less Satisfying Over Time
ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
Explain “sycophancy” to your kids and show them how AI can agree with and validate the person prompting it.
Encourage kids to question AI responses rather than treating them as neutral advice.
Be cautious about using AI to decide who is right during friendship or family conflict.
Help kids practise disagreement, compromise and repair with real people.
Model curiosity when challenged instead of immediately defending your position.
Keep talking. A real conversation may be messier than AI, but learning to navigate that mess matters.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Gaming can be a source of connection, competence and joy, especially for neurodivergent kids. But when switching off leads to arguments, anxiety or explosive behaviour, parents need more than another screen-time rule.
Justin speaks with Game Aware founder Andrew Kinch about why some kids are drawn so strongly to gaming, how neurodivergence can shape that relationship, and what parents can do when gaming starts crowding out sleep, school, movement and family life. They unpack the difference between gaming for enjoyment and gaming for escape, why timers can make transitions harder, and how understanding your child's favourite game could reduce conflict at home.
KEY POINTS:
Why gaming and general screen time aren't the same thing
The particular role gaming can play for neurodivergent kids
How gaming meets needs for competence, autonomy and connection
Why using games to escape stress, bullying, anxiety or other struggles can become problematic
Why countdown timers can increase anxiety around switching off
How a stopwatch can encourage kids to practise self-regulation
The value of a calming "buffer" activity after gaming
Why parents should spend time learning how their child's favourite game actually works
How understanding what your child gets from gaming can change the conversation at home
QUOTE OF THE EPISODE:
"What job is the game doing for them?"
Andrew Kinch
RESOURCES MENTIONED:
Game Aware Activity Finder and family support
Self-Determination Theory
Johann Hari's work on addiction and connection
ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS:
Get curious about what gaming gives your child before focusing on how long they're playing.
Notice whether they're gaming for fun and connection or using it to escape something difficult.
Try replacing a countdown timer with a stopwatch that helps them monitor their own gaming time.
Plan something enjoyable or calming for immediately after gaming rather than expecting an abrupt switch into chores or family demands.
Sit beside your child and learn their game. Understand what they're trying to achieve, when a round ends and why stopping halfway through can feel so frustrating.
If gaming is seriously affecting sleep, school, relationships, physical activity or safety at home, seek specialised support.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.