Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

One in three Australian kids is struggling to read at the expected level. In a classroom of 30, that’s 10 children falling behind.
Justin speaks with Rachel Amorosakra from Reading Out of Poverty about what poor literacy looks like for kids, why access to books in the first five years matters so much, and the confronting reality for children in remote communities who may not own a single book.
With Book Week approaching, they look at a practical way families can help put culturally appropriate books into the hands of children in East Arnhem Land.
KEY POINTS
One in three Australian children is not meeting grade-level expectations in reading.
Struggling to read affects far more than English. It can make maths, science and other subjects harder too.
Falling behind can leave children embarrassed, disengaged and believing they simply aren't smart.
The first five years are critical for building vocabulary, imagination and early literacy skills.
Books create connection between children and caregivers, not just reading skills.
Many children in remote East Arnhem Land communities have little access to books.
Reading Out of Poverty is providing culturally appropriate literacy packs to children this Book Week.
QUOTE OF THE EPISODE
“Books aren't just about the reading itself. It's about building connection with parents and caregivers.”
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Reading Out of Poverty
Book Week
Reading Out of Poverty literacy packs for children in East Arnhem Land
Each $25 donation funds one literacy pack containing five age-appropriate books and educational resources.
ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
Read with your child regularly, especially during the early years.
Make books easy to reach and part of everyday family life.
Let young children choose books they want to hear again and again.
Use stories as time to connect, talk and explore ideas together.
This Book Week, consider donating a literacy pack to help a child in East Arnhem Land access books of their own.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Firstborns tend to earn more, study longer and experience better mental health than their younger siblings. For decades, researchers have struggled to explain why.
A huge study following 1.2 million Danish children has uncovered a surprising piece of the puzzle. It may have less to do with personality or favouritism and more to do with germs, early illness and the extra time firstborns get with their parents.
In this episode, Justin and Kylie unpack what birth order research actually tells us, why the first six months matter so much, and the simple things parents can do to help level the playing field.
KEY POINTS
Firstborns show small but consistent advantages in earnings, education and mental health across large population studies.
Younger siblings are more likely to be exposed to respiratory illnesses during their first year, often brought home by older siblings.
Early illness may explain a significant portion of the birth order gap.
Firstborns can receive thousands more hours of reading, talking and playing with parents by age 13.
Birth order is not destiny. These findings describe population averages, not what will happen to an individual child.
Parents can reduce some of these differences through illness prevention, connection and intentional one-on-one time.
QUOTE OF THE EPISODE
“Your youngest child is not doomed, your eldest is not blessed.”
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Article in The Washington
ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
Keep recommended immunisations up to date and discuss newborn protection with your healthcare provider.
Breastfeed if you can and if it works for your family.
Get older siblings washing their hands when they come home from school or daycare.
Keep sick siblings away from newborns, particularly during the first six months.
Make space for one-on-one reading, talking and play with younger children.
Forget the stopwatch. Aim to be available and connected rather than trying to divide your attention perfectly equally.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Friendship isn't just part of childhood. It shapes confidence, mental health and whether kids feel they belong. So why does it seem harder than ever?
Michelle Mitchell joins Dr Justin Coulson to unpack the biggest friendship mistakes parents make, why today's kids need more than "just go and play", and the simple framework that helps children build healthier, stronger relationships. If your child is dealing with friendship drama, loneliness or constant social ups and downs, this conversation will change the way you guide them.
KEY POINTS
Why friendship struggles sit behind so many school and wellbeing issues.
What's changed for today's kids and why friendships feel more complicated than ever.
Michelle Mitchell's three-part friendship framework: safety, chemistry and effort.
How to help children recognise healthy, one-sided and situational friendships.
Why parents shouldn't feel guilty for staying involved in their child's friendships.
Practical advice for supporting neurodivergent children to build meaningful connections.
The surprising research about bullying that every parent needs to hear.
How technology is quietly changing what children expect from friendships.
QUOTE OF THE EPISODE
"Friendships are founded on safety. They gather energy through chemistry. They're sustained through effort."
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Friendship Smart by Michelle Mitchell.
A Little More Social by Nicholas Epley.
ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
Talk about one friendship with your child this week using three questions. Does it feel safe? Is there real connection? Are both people putting in effort?
Help your child see that not every friendship needs to be equally close.
Look beyond school for friendships through family, neighbours, hobbies and community groups.
Notice when technology is shaping your child's expectations of friendship and talk openly about what healthy relationships look like.
Remind your child that strong friendships grow over time through trust, kindness and consistency.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Nothing seems to work.
You model gratitude. You talk about growth mindset. You ask what went well each day. Yet your child still expects the worst, finds the problem first, and drains every exciting moment.
So should you keep trying to make them more positive?
In this episode, Justin and Kylie answer a question from a mum of 11-year-old twins who worries one daughter always sees the glass half empty. They unpack why some children naturally think this way, why forcing optimism often backfires, and the simple shift that helps children become more resilient without feeling like they're being fixed.
If you've ever wondered how to support a child who always seems negative, this conversation might completely change how you see them.
KEY POINTS
Why temperament isn't something parents can change
The surprising downside of pushing gratitude and positivity
What defensive pessimism is and why it can actually be protective
How to acknowledge feelings without making them bigger
Why autonomy matters more than getting the "right" answer
The hidden pressure that can exist between siblings and twins
Small ways to build optimism without forcing it
QUOTE OF THE EPISODE
"The fastest way to have a more positive child is making peace with the negative one."
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Leave a question for the Happy Families Podcast
Growth mindset
Gratitude practices
Defensive pessimism
Autonomy and intrinsic motivation
ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
Stop trying to fix your child's personality.
Get curious about what their negativity is telling you.
Acknowledge feelings without dwelling on them.
Give your child genuine choice instead of demanding positive responses.
Model optimism consistently and let your child come to it in their own time.
Spend one-on-one time with each child, especially if sibling comparisons are common.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Most relationships don't fall apart because of one big moment. They drift because of hundreds of tiny missed moments.
In this episode, Dr Justin and Kylie Coulson unpack five surprisingly simple weekly habits that relationship therapists see again and again in happy, long-lasting couples. None of them require expensive date nights, grand romantic gestures or endless free time.
From weekly check-ins to repairing arguments, these small rituals help couples stay connected through the chaos of work, parenting and everyday life. If you've ever felt like you're living alongside your partner instead of with them, this conversation offers practical ways to find your way back.
KEY POINTS
Why happy couples schedule weekly relationship check-ins.
The simple conversation that builds connection instead of just swapping information.
How one sentence can completely change the way you handle conflict.
Why repairing arguments matters more than avoiding them.
The surprising power of everyday touch with no expectations attached.
Why therapists say connection matters more than traditional date nights.
Small weekly habits create stronger relationships over time.
QUOTE OF THE EPISODE
"Happy couples don't do more. They schedule more."
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Stylist magazine article featuring relationship therapists.
The Gottman Institute's six-second kiss concept.
Happy Families family meeting framework.
ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS
Set aside 20 minutes each week to talk about family logistics before they become arguments.
Spend five to ten minutes each day checking in beyond "How was your day?"
When conflict arises, begin with, "The story I told myself was..." before sharing your feelings.
Add more everyday affection with hugs, hand holding or a quick kiss that doesn't have to lead anywhere.
Replace the pressure of a perfect date night with one simple activity you both enjoy every week.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.