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Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

Dr Justin Coulson
Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families
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  • When Schools Get Culture Right, Everything Changes - with Adam Voigt
    They talk a lot about culture in schools/education. What’s really driving teacher burnout, student disengagement, and poor behaviour in schools? In this compelling conversation, I’m joined by Adam Voigt—former principal, education thought leader, and founder of Real Schools—to explore why culture, not curriculum, is the true heart of great education. From phone bans to shocking increases in sexualised behaviour, we unpack the most pressing issues in today’s classrooms—and how families can play a vital role in shaping school culture for the better. KEY POINTS: Why phone bans work—and the student-led secret to getting buy-in from kids The disturbing rise of sexualised behaviour and harassment in schools Teacher burnout: why it’s getting worse and how to turn it around How shame, not badness, drives poor behaviour—and what restorative practices offer instead The 3 consistent challenges teachers face: student behaviour, workload, and parent interactions Why building school culture is the most powerful thing a school can do How culture improves outcomes for students, teachers, and parents alike QUOTE OF THE EPISODE: “We need to reclaim how we work—not just the classroom. When schools focus on culture, every stakeholder benefits.” – Adam Voigt RESOURCES MENTIONED: Restoring Teaching by Adam Voigt – Free eBook, audiobook & print-at-cost version Adam’s organisation: Real Schools Happy Families resources for families and schools: happyfamilies.com.au ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS: Be a culture builder at your child’s school. Ask the principal or teacher, “What’s our school’s culture—and how can I support it?” Talk to your child about phone use—and help them practice face-to-face connection at home. Model respectful behaviour, especially around teachers. Show your child that respect is foundational, not optional. Challenge inappropriate content and conversations early. Don’t wait for school to step in—your voice matters first. Share Adam’s book with your school’s leadership team. It’s a small gesture that could shift the culture in big ways. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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  • All the Lonely Parents, Where Has the Village Gone?
    You send out party invitations and… crickets. Or worse — a wall of “maybe” and no-shows. Are parents today just too busy, too anxious, or too uninterested to connect? Justin and Kylie tackle the growing epidemic of “commitment-phobia” among modern parents and uncover why it’s harder than ever to build the village our kids desperately need. From loneliness to overload to digital distractions, you’ll learn the real reasons parents opt out — and four surprisingly simple ways to bring connection back. If you’ve ever wondered why it feels like you’re parenting alone — and how to change that — this is the episode you need. KEY POINTS: Why today’s parents avoid social commitments (and it’s not just post-COVID). The collapse of “enforced proximity” and accidental connection. Why loneliness is now a public health crisis. How treating community like a marketplace keeps us isolated. The role of emotional overload and overstimulation. 4 actionable ways to rebuild your village — one parent at a time. QUOTE OF THE EPISODE: "Other people matter. The community you’re craving already exists — it’s just hiding behind the same fears and overwhelm you’re feeling." RESOURCES MENTIONED: Submit your tricky parenting questions here ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS: Create low-stakes, frequent opportunities for connection — coffee catch-ups, quick chats at pick-up, or a casual park playdate. Focus on contribution: ask “What can I give?” instead of “What’s in it for me?” Schedule digital downtime daily — put your phone down and reclaim your mental space. Don’t fear rejection. Keep showing up. Start with one parent and build from there. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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  • Backchat and Eye Rolls? What Your Kids’ Sass Is Really Telling You
    Every parent hits that moment — the eye roll, the “you’re so unfair,” the slammed door. It’s the backchat that drives us up the wall. But what if we told you that this so-called “sass” is actually a sign of something good? In today’s episode, Justin and Kylie unpack why backchat is one of the most misunderstood parts of child development — and how you can respond in a way that strengthens your relationship, rather than wrecking it. We share 3 practical mindset shifts and 4 go-to scripts you can use today to turn attitude into connection and cooperation. Yes, even when the sass is strong. KEY POINTS: Backchat is often a clumsy expression of unmet needs — not a sign of defiance Reframing disrespect as a lack of skills (not a lack of values) changes everything Power struggles escalate when we seek control instead of connection Meeting autonomy, relatedness, and competence needs helps reduce pushback Get curious, not furious — especially when emotions are high Four practical scripts help parents respond with connection, not control QUOTE OF THE EPISODE: “Disrespect often isn’t deliberate — it’s just clumsy communication from a kid who doesn’t yet have the skills to do it better.” RESOURCES MENTIONED: The 3 Basic Psychological Needs: Autonomy, Relatedness, Competence The “Get Curious, Not Furious” principle happyfamilies.com.au for more resources and support ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS: Reframe backchat as a sign of emotional overwhelm or unmet needs Use validating language like “Sometimes it feels like I’m your enemy, doesn’t it?” Offer autonomy with choices (“I don’t mind when you do it — just have it done by dinner”) Give in fantasy what they can’t have in reality to lighten the moment Use the 3 E’s Script: “Sounds like you’re really frustrated... will you help me see what’s bothering you?” Set boundaries with respect: “I’m going to give you a chance to rethink that and try again in harmony with our values.” See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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  • No One Talks About the Real Cost of Family Fun
    What kind of parent willingly gives up a peaceful beach day… for four hours of standing in theme park lines? In this episode, Justin shares the story of his most "Father of the Year" moment — and Kylie reveals how she did something even braver. If you’ve ever had to choose between comfort and connection, this one’s for you. KEY POINTS: Why showing up — even when it’s uncomfortable — creates lasting memories for our kids.The unexpected benefits of shared boredom (like standing in line together!).How doing things you hate can still bring joy — to both you and your kids.The value of modelling courage, humour, and presence (even on the Kansas Twister).Why it’s often the hard, inconvenient moments that matter most in family life. QUOTE OF THE EPISODE: “Do the hard things. The joy it brings your kids — seeing you squeal, be scared, and do it anyway — you can’t put a price on that.” RESOURCES MENTIONED: HappyFamilies.com.au — for more parenting inspiration and tools. ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS: Say Yes to the Hard Thing – Whether it’s a dreaded ride, a messy game, or a long conversation, lean in. Model Being Brave – Let your kids see you doing things outside your comfort zone. Find Joy in the Chaos – Embrace the mess, the lines, and the noise as chances to connect. Reflect and Celebrate – Share the story with your kids afterwards. Celebrate effort, not perfection. Plan Your Own "Hard Thing" – Ask yourself: What’s one thing I can do this week that puts my kids first, even if it’s uncomfortable? See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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  • When Your Child Questions Their Gender: A Parent’s Guide to Staying Calm [Parental Guidance Ep. 4]
    Few topics divide parents more than gender identity — and the stakes couldn’t be higher. On the last episode of Parental Guidance, the debate ignited strong emotions and hard truths about what it means to protect our kids’ mental health while avoiding irreversible mistakes. In today’s podcast, Justin and Kylie break down the episode, share insights from research, and offer calm, practical advice for navigating this sensitive topic as a parent. KEY POINTS: Why this issue is so emotionally loaded. What we don’t know The strong correlation between gender identity struggles and other issues like autism, anxiety, depression, and online influences Why ‘affirmation-only’ models are controversial The role of screens and peer groups in shaping kids’ beliefs about gender. Why delaying medical or surgical interventions while maintaining love and openness can be the wisest path forward QUOTE OF THE EPISODE: "You want to keep your kids safe, loved, and supported — but you also want to move slowly, with wisdom and care, because these decisions have lifelong consequences." — Justin Coulson RESOURCES MENTIONED: Time to Think by Hannah Barnes (on the Tavistock Clinic and gender identity diagnoses) Articles and more resources at happyfamilies.com.au ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS: Limit screen time and social media exposure, especially to platforms like TikTok or Tumblr where gender identity narratives can be amplified. Check your child’s peer group influences — and watch for “cluster” patterns in friend groups. Find a good psychologist or counsellor who will explore underlying emotional, developmental, and psychological factors instead of rushing to affirm. Stay compassionate and keep the dialogue open with your child. Let them know you love and support them unconditionally — while explaining that serious medical decisions can wait. Delay irreversible interventions (like hormones or surgery) until your child is much older and has had time to mature and reflect. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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About Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

The Happy Families Podcast with Dr. Justin Coulson is designed for the time poor parent who just wants answers now. Every day Justin and his wife Kylie provide practical tips and a common sense approach to parenting that Mums and Dads all over the world are connecting with. Justin and Kylie have 6 daughters and they regularly share their experiences of managing a busy household filled with lots of challenges and plenty of happiness. For real and practicable advice from people who understand and appreciate the challenges of a time poor parent, listen to Justin and Kylie and help make your family happier.
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