Not all red flags are loud or obvious. Some show up in small, repeated moments that leave you feeling uneasy.In this episode of This Complex Life, I unpack 10 relationship red flags you shouldn’t ignore. These aren’t just the dramatic ones like cheating or lying, they’re the quieter patterns that can slowly wear you down over time.I talk about how to tell the difference between a red flag and a misunderstanding, what emotional safety really means, and how to use discomfort as a signal to reflect, not overreact.Key takeaways:Why red flags aren’t always a reason to leave (but still matter)How disrespect, sarcasm or subtle put-downs can erode safetyThe importance of accountability and emotional maturityWhy repeated boundary-pushing isn’t just annoying, it’s a warningWhat to look for when it comes to emotional manipulationSigns of poor frustration tolerance and conditional kindnessHow to use red flags as prompts for reflection, not panicResources:Listen to the previous episode on trust: https://marievakakis.com.au/why-love-isnt-enough-when-trust-is-missing/ Relationship Refresh course: https://www.marievakakis.com.au/coursesIf this episode stirred something for you, you’re not alone. These conversations are hard but they matter.Connected Teens https://marievakakis.com.au/connected-teens/Connect with Marie https://thetherapyhub.com.au/ https://marievakakis.com.au/ https://www.instagram.com/marievakakis/Submit a question to the Podcasthttps://forms.gle/nvNQyw9gJXMNnveY6
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11:46
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11:46
Why Love Isn’t Enough When Trust Is Missing
Love matters, but without trust, relationships can’t feel safe.In this episode of This Complex Life, I will share what happens when couples love each other deeply but still feel disconnected. We often think love will carry us through anything, but when trust is missing, the relationship can start to erode.I share why trust breaks down (even without betrayal), how to recognise the small moments that matter, and what you can do to start rebuilding.Using the BRAVING framework, this episode gives you a clear way to understand what trust really looks like, and practical steps to reconnect with care, not criticism.Key takeaways:Trust erodes slowly, often in silence, not always through big betrayalsWhy emotional safety is just as important as loveHow boundaries, reliability and integrity build trustUsing BRAVING to talk about trust without blameHow to repair trust when someone feels let downWhy love alone isn’t enough if your partner doesn’t feel safeThe power of small, repeated actions over grand gesturesResources:Relationship Refresh CourseThe Therapy HubBrené Brown’s BRAVING InventoryIf you found this episode helpful, I’d love for you to share it with someone supporting their relationship. You can find more episodes and tools at marievakakis.com.auConnected Teens https://marievakakis.com.au/connected-teens/Connect with Marie https://thetherapyhub.com.au/ https://marievakakis.com.au/ https://www.instagram.com/marievakakis/Submit a question to the Podcasthttps://forms.gle/nvNQyw9gJXMNnveY6
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18:35
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18:35
When Your Teen Struggles to Make Friends. What Parents Can Do That Actually Helps
It’s hard to watch your child struggle to make friends. You might feel stuck between wanting to help and not wanting to push too hard.In this episode of This Complex Life, I answer a listener’s question "Hi Marie. My daughter has trouble making friends. We really pinned all our hopes and things changing when she started high school this year, but it has come around to the school holidays again and she is feeling sad and lonely. I don't know how best to support her. Should I fill her days with activities that I think might be fun?" I explore why some teens feel lonely even when they’re surrounded by peers, why pushing activities can backfire, and what parents can do to stay connected without adding pressure.This conversation is for anyone wondering how to support young people who are navigating social struggles and feeling left out.Key Takeaways:Why friendship struggles can follow teens even in a fresh school environmentThe difference between loneliness and healthy solitudeWhy pushing activities and giving too much advice can backfireThe self-fulfilling cycle of social anxiety and avoidanceWhy some teens connect better with adults or younger children, not their peersHow to ask gentle, open-ended questions without creating pressureHow to stay emotionally available and supportive without trying to fix itPractical ways to explore screen use with curiosity instead of shameResources:The Therapy HubRelationship Refresh CourseMoving from Manager to Consultant If you found this episode helpful, I’d love for you to share it with other parents, carers, or anyone supporting teens through friendship challenges. You can find more episodes, resources, and workshops on the website.You might also like other episodes that explore parenting, connection, and supporting young people through life’s challenges.Connected Teens https://marievakakis.com.au/connected-teens/Connect with Marie https://thetherapyhub.com.au/ https://marievakakis.com.au/ https://www.instagram.com/marievakakis/Submit a question to the Podcasthttps://forms.gle/nvNQyw9gJXMNnveY6
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25:21
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25:21
Why We Avoid Talking About Sex (And How to Start)
Why We Avoid Talking About S3x (And How to Start)Conversations about sex often feel awkward, avoidant or emotionally loaded. I talk about what’s happening underneath the surface, how gender myths and pressure shape desire, and what couples can do to reconnect with honesty and care.In this episode, I share :How emotional safety shapes intimacyWhat’s really behind avoidance in long-term relationshipsGender myths and pressure in sexual desireWhy non-sexual connection mattersHow to talk about sex without shame or fearWhen therapy might helpResourcesGottman Love Deck App: gottman.com/couples/appsRelationship Refresh Course: https://marievakakis.com.au/courses/relationship-refresh/ Therapy Hub: thetherapyhub.com.auNot Having Enough Sex in Your Relationship?https://marievakakis.com.au/not-having-enough-sex-in-your-relationship/ FREE resource to help you talk about sex, desire and connection https://marie-vakakis.mykajabi.com/pl/2148681133 Connected Teens https://marievakakis.com.au/connected-teens/Connect with Marie https://thetherapyhub.com.au/ https://marievakakis.com.au/ https://www.instagram.com/marievakakis/Submit a question to the Podcasthttps://forms.gle/nvNQyw9gJXMNnveY6
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16:29
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16:29
Navigating Therapy as a BIPOC Client: Stigma, Support & Healing with Tham Fuyana
What if your therapist just gets it and you don’t have to explain everything from scratch?That’s what this episode is all about. I sat down with Tham Fuyana, Social Worker family Therapist and Educator, to talk about what it’s like navigating therapy as a BIPOC client. BIPOC stands for Black, Indigenous, and people/ person of colour In this episode, Tham shares his reflections growing up as a Black migrant, navigating services that didn’t always see him, and why representation in therapy matters.Key takeawaysWhat people mean when they talk about “finding a BIPOC therapist”Why it’s not just about matching identities but understanding lived experienceHow intersectionality shows up in the therapy roomThe emotional cost of constantly having to explain your backgroundWhat makes some clients feel safer and more understoodThe layers of distrust that come from experiences with police, migration and health systemsHow a sense of collective identity can offer comfort and where it can be complexThe importance of cultural humility and curiosity in therapeutic workIf this conversation sparked something for you, whether you’re a client looking for support or a professional thinking about your own practice, keep the momentum going. Share it with someone who needs to hear it, have the hard chats and take a look at who’s in the room with you. Because who we sit with matters.ResourcesThe Therapy Hubwww.thetherapyhub.com.auConnected Teens https://marievakakis.com.au/connected-teens/Connect with Marie https://thetherapyhub.com.au/ https://marievakakis.com.au/ https://www.instagram.com/marievakakis/Submit a question to the Podcasthttps://forms.gle/nvNQyw9gJXMNnveY6
Got questions about parenting, teenagers, or relationships? Ever wonder why your teen won’t talk to you, or why your relationship feels like hard work lately? Hi, I’m Marie Vakakis—a therapist, mental health educator, and someone who’s been behind the scenes with countless families and couples navigating the ups and downs of real life.
This Complex Life is your go-to for relatable insights, practical advice, and real talk about parenting, raising teenagers, and navigating relationships. I’ll share what I’ve learned from years of sitting in the therapist’s chair—helping parents understand their teens, supporting couples through tough times, and figuring out what actually works when life feels overwhelming.
Whether it’s understanding your teen’s moods, handling family drama, or reconnecting in your relationship, I’m here to give you practical advice, relatable insights and a little humour to keep it real. Parenting and relationships aren’t easy, but they don’t have to feel impossible.
Subscribe to This Complex Life for honest advice and actionable tips to make life’s messiness more manageable.
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