Passion Struck with John R. Miles

Why What Matters Most Is Rarely the Loudest
What if the things getting the most attention in your life aren't actually the things that matter most?
We live in a world that rewards visibility. The viral headline. The impressive title. The dramatic turnaround. The big announcement. The person who creates the most noise in the room. But some of the most valuable things in life work differently.
They compound quietly.
In this episode of Passion Struck, John R. Miles explores why human beings are so easily drawn toward what is visible, dramatic, and immediate—and why that can cause us to overlook the people, decisions, relationships, and foundations that create lasting value.
The episode begins with the famous Joshua Bell experiment, in which one of the world's greatest violinists played a $3.5 million Stradivarius in a Washington, D.C., Metro station and collected just $32.17. The music hadn't changed. The context had.
John then connects this phenomenon to markets, workplaces, leadership, and his own experience at Dell, where a promising Android and cloud strategy was ultimately abandoned amid the company's dependence on Microsoft.
The deeper lesson is about salience: our tendency to notice what is flashy and immediate while overlooking what is subtle and important.
In this episode, you'll discover:
Why visibility and value are often two very different things
What the Joshua Bell experiment reveals about human attention
Why intelligent people can still get pulled toward hype and spectacle
How organizations can reward dramatic behavior while overlooking quiet contribution
What John's experience at Dell taught him about confusing legacy value with future opportunity
Why human trust, dignity, culture, and connection can be harder to measure—but enormously consequential
How conformity can cause us to abandon our own judgment when everyone else agrees
Why Alex Edmans' advice to “see the other side” is such a powerful decision-making practice
How to use John's Signal Audit to separate external applause from intrinsic value
Why real adaptability isn't always about moving faster—it can mean stopping, filtering the noise, and seeing what others are missing
The question to take with you is simple: Where are you giving your best energy to something loud while starving something quiet that actually matters?
Because the crowd will always react to what is flashy and immediate. Your job is to learn how to recognize the signal.
Grab the Full Show Notes

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Connect with John
Website: https://johnrmiles.com
Book John to Speak: https://johnrmiles.com/speaking/
Substack: https://www.theignitedlife.net/
Children’s Book — You Matter, Luma: https://youmatterluma.com/

Support the Movement: https://startmattering.com/. Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and like they matter. Wear it. Live it. Show it.
Passion Struck — #1 Alternative Health Podcast. 85M+ downloads.

Disclaimer

The Passion Struck podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. This podcast is not a substitute for professional medical or psychological advice.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What if the question you’re avoiding is the one you most need to answer?
We often think courage means doing something difficult or frightening. But Scott Simon says the place people struggle most isn't physical courage—it’s having the courage to ask and answer hard questions.
In this episode, Scott Simon and Gregory Stock bring together two decades-long bodies of work: Scott’s exploration of courage and Gregory’s groundbreaking Book of Questions, which became a New York Times bestseller and sold millions of copies.
Their new book, The Book of Questions: Courage, is built around a simple idea: the right question can take you beneath the surface of your life and reveal what you actually believe, fear, want, and value.
And sometimes, one honest question can change the direction of your life.
In this conversation, we explore:
Why asking yourself a hard question can require more courage than taking action
The question Scott says cuts directly to the core: What lie are you telling yourself to keep yourself safe that is actually holding you back?
Why great questions don't give you answers—they create space for self-discovery
How vulnerability can make people feel more connected rather than more exposed
Why one meaningful question can turn an ordinary dinner into an hour-long conversation that people remember
Why we often avoid deeper conversations even with the people we know best
What we're losing in an increasingly distracted, answer-rich world
Which questions we should deliberately refuse to outsource to AI
Why AI can provide information but still cannot tell us who we want to become
The question Scott believes everyone should ask: What is something extraordinary you've done well before you felt ready or confident?
One of the most powerful ideas in the conversation is that a good question doesn't close a conversation—it opens one. So before you move on with your day, ask yourself:
What is one question I've been avoiding because I already suspect I know the answer? That might be where your next chapter begins.
Get the full show notes

Pre-Order The Mattering Effect: https://matteringeffect.com/. Take the 90-second diagnostic to see if you're disappearing.
Explore the Show: https://passionstruck.com/starter-packs/. New to Passion Struck? Start with the best episodes curated for you.
Connect with John
Website: https://johnrmiles.com
Book John to Speak: https://johnrmiles.com/speaking/
Substack: https://www.theignitedlife.net/
Children’s Book — You Matter, Luma: https://youmatterluma.com/

Support the Movement: https://startmattering.com/. Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and like they matter. Wear it. Live it. Show it.
Passion Struck — #1 Alternative Health Podcast. 85M+ downloads.

Disclaimer

The Passion Struck podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. This podcast is not a substitute for professional medical or psychological advice.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

You're smart. You're informed. So why do you still make terrible decisions?
We like to believe that intelligence and information protect us from bad decisions. They don't.
Professor Alex Edmans, Professor of Finance at London Business School and Fellow of the British Academy, returns to Passion Struck to reveal the psychological forces that can distort our judgment—from confirmation bias and anchoring to herd behavior, emotional decision-making, and our tendency to follow whatever information is most visible.
His new book, The Madness of Markets, uses financial markets to expose a much bigger truth about human behavior: the same biases that influence investors can shape the decisions we make in our careers, leadership, relationships, and everyday lives.
Even Isaac Newton wasn't immune.
In this conversation, Alex explains:
Why being intelligent doesn't make you rational
Why more information doesn't necessarily lead to better decisions
How confirmation bias makes us see evidence that supports what we already believe
Why we tend to overreact to information that's flashy, visible, and impossible to ignore
How anchoring causes the first information we encounter to influence our later judgment
Why millions of people making the same mistake can create collective irrationality rather than canceling one another out
How compelling stories can overpower better evidence
Why culture, human capital, reputation, and innovation can matter enormously even when they're difficult to measure
Why AI may change the decisions humans make without eliminating human bias
And the one question Alex believes can make you wiser: “What is the other side?”
Alex's advice extends far beyond investing. Before you change jobs, relocate, end a relationship, make a major purchase, or commit to an important belief, look for the strongest argument against your own position.
If you can't see it yourself, find someone you trust who disagrees with you and ask them to make the case. Because becoming a better decision-maker isn't always about knowing more. Sometimes it's about learning to see what you're missing.
Listen to the full shownotes
Download the FREE Companion Digital Workbook

Pre-Order The Mattering Effect: https://matteringeffect.com/. Take the 90-second diagnostic to see if you're disappearing.
Explore the Show: https://passionstruck.com/starter-packs/. New to Passion Struck? Start with the best episodes curated for you.
Connect with John
Website: https://johnrmiles.com
Book John to Speak: https://johnrmiles.com/speaking/
Substack: https://www.theignitedlife.net/
Children’s Book — You Matter, Luma: https://youmatterluma.com/

Support the Movement: https://startmattering.com/. Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and like they matter. Wear it. Live it. Show it.
Passion Struck — #1 Alternative Health Podcast. 85M+ downloads.

Disclaimer

The Passion Struck podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. This podcast is not a substitute for professional medical or psychological advice.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What if the proof you're waiting for never comes?
The apology. The promotion. The recognition.
Someone finally admitting they were wrong about you. Someone finally telling you that you belong.
What if you're waiting for proof that you don't actually need?
After conversations with Cole Brauer and psychologist Marisa Franco, John R. Miles noticed a powerful connection between their work.
Cole was told she was too small to survive the Southern Ocean. A year later, she sailed solo, nonstop, and unassisted around the world—without ever receiving the apology or reversal she had been waiting for. Marisa's research reveals the other side of the equation: when we already believe we're unworthy, even love, success, compliments, and positive feedback can fail to change that belief. Sometimes, the evidence simply doesn't match the story we already carry about ourselves.
In this solo episode, John brings those two ideas together to explore The Verification Trap—the tendency to wait for external proof before allowing ourselves to believe we're capable, worthy, or ready to move forward.
You'll discover:
Why a genuine compliment can sometimes make people feel worse instead of better
How rejection can become part of the story you believe about yourself
Why success and achievement don't necessarily resolve a deeper sense of unworthiness
How your memories can become a database that filters the evidence you receive
Why waiting for someone to reverse their judgment can keep you stuck
The difference between being validated and actually believing you're worthy
What Cole Brauer's story teaches us about moving forward without permission
Why healing requires honesty rather than constantly trying to become a better version of yourself
John's two-question Verification Check for identifying where you're waiting for external proof
How to take the smallest possible step toward something you've been waiting for permission to do
And John gets personal, sharing a previously untold chapter of his own life and what rebuilding after divorce taught him about validation, action, and self-trust. He realized that the proof didn't come before he moved forward.
The proof came after.
The Verification Check
Ask yourself: What specific proof am I waiting for before I let myself move forward?
Then ask: If that proof never arrives, is there a version of this where I go anyway?
Because sometimes you don't need the verdict reversed. You need to leave the dock.
Read the Full Show Notes

Pre-Order The Mattering Effect: https://matteringeffect.com/. Take the 90-second diagnostic to see if you're disappearing.
Explore the Show: https://passionstruck.com/starter-packs/. New to Passion Struck? Start with the best episodes curated for you.
Connect with John
Website: https://johnrmiles.com
Book John to Speak: https://johnrmiles.com/speaking/
Substack: https://www.theignitedlife.net/
Children’s Book — You Matter, Luma: https://youmatterluma.com/

Support the Movement: https://startmattering.com/. Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and like they matter. Wear it. Live it. Show it.
Passion Struck — #1 Alternative Health Podcast. 85M+ downloads.

Disclaimer

The Passion Struck podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. This podcast is not a substitute for professional medical or psychological advice.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Why do you still feel like you're not enough—even when your life looks successful from the outside?
You can have a successful career, loving relationships, and people who genuinely care about you—and still struggle to believe you're worthy of love, connection, or belonging.
Marisa G. Franco, psychologist and author of the New York Times bestseller Platonic, returns to Passion Struck to explore the deeper science behind self-worth in her new book, Worth: The New Science of Self-Esteem and Secure Attachment.
Her argument challenges one of the most common ideas about self-esteem: you don't become worthy by achieving more, becoming more impressive, or convincing yourself that you're extraordinary.
Instead, worth begins with something much harder—and much more honest: learning to accept yourself as you are.
In this conversation, Marisa explains:
Why achievement, compliments, and positive affirmations often fail to fix low self-worth
How childhood memories can become the lens through which we predict rejection, abandonment, or failure
Why trying to appear “secure” can actually disconnect you from your authentic self
The hidden cost of making your worth dependent on achievement
Why healing isn't becoming a better version of yourself—it's reconnecting with the parts of yourself you've learned to ignore
What “open memories” are and why unresolved experiences can continue shaping how you see yourself decades later
How attachment styles can be understood as adaptive responses rather than fixed identities
Why we need to stop treating our emotions as problems to solve and start allowing them to move through us
How memory reconsolidation may help us create new meaning around painful experiences
Why sometimes becoming healthier means allowing a relationship to end rather than abandoning yourself to save it
One of the most powerful ideas in our conversation is this: The goal isn't to convince yourself that you're extraordinary. It's to recognize that you're worthy even when you're ordinary.
Marisa's work offers a different way to think about healing: not as a project of optimization, but as the process of coming home to yourself.
Click here for the full shownotes
Download the FREE Companion Digital Workbook here.

Pre-Order The Mattering Effect: https://matteringeffect.com/. Take the 90-second diagnostic to see if you're disappearing.
Explore the Show: https://passionstruck.com/starter-packs/. New to Passion Struck? Start with the best episodes curated for you.
Connect with John
Website: https://johnrmiles.com
Book John to Speak: https://johnrmiles.com/speaking/
Substack: https://www.theignitedlife.net/
Children’s Book — You Matter, Luma: https://youmatterluma.com/

Support the Movement: https://startmattering.com/. Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and like they matter. Wear it. Live it. Show it.
Passion Struck — #1 Alternative Health Podcast. 85M+ downloads.

Disclaimer

The Passion Struck podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. This podcast is not a substitute for professional medical or psychological advice.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.