The Tamsen Show

Women are often taught to treat everyone else’s time as protected and their own as endlessly available. Over time, that can affect their careers, relationships, confidence, and sense of identity.

New York Times bestselling author Eve Rodsky joins Tamsen to explain Fair Play, a system that makes invisible work visible and gives one person complete ownership of each responsibility, from noticing that it needs to happen through planning and execution. Eve shares the “blueberries breakdown” that led her to create it, why “Just tell me what to do” still leaves women managing the work, and how boundaries, systems, and communication can change the way a family runs.

If you are the person who remembers every appointment, manages an aging parent’s care, or follows up when no one else does, this episode offers a practical way to stop carrying everyone else’s responsibilities in your head and start treating your own time as equally valuable.

They get into:

- How Fair Play applies beyond marriage and motherhood

- How to tell whether the problem requires a boundary, a system, or a conversation

- When guilt is really a response to someone else’s discomfort

- Why fairness does not always mean a 50-50 split

- What it takes to build an identity beyond being needed

For everything mentioned in this episode, click this link

If you liked this episode, you'll love Israa Nasir: Why You Always Feel Behind (And How to Break Free)

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Medical Disclaimer:

The information provided in this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult with a qualified healthcare professional regarding any medical concerns or treatment options. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of The Tamsen Show.

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Should I stay or should I go? If you’re asking yourself “Should I get a divorce?”, I sat down with divorce attorney Jenny Hutt, who is separated from her husband, to talk about why gray divorce has doubled since 1990, why midlife divorce so often hits when the kids leave and an empty nest marriage goes quiet, and what to know before facing divorce after 50. If you’ve looked across the table at the person you’ve built a life with and realized you have nothing to say, you’re not alone.

In this episode, Tamsen sits down with divorce attorney Jenny Hutt, a New York family law attorney and certified divorce mediator, Of Counsel at Wisselman Harounian Family Law, and host of the Just Jenny podcast, to talk about why so many marriages end in midlife and how to make an honest decision about your own.

Jenny, who is separated from her husband, explains why so many couples wait until the kids are out of the house, how losing a parent can bring up the question “How much time do I have left?”, and why the “guns blazing” divorce you see on TV is not how it really works. Tamsen opens up about her own divorce 15 years ago, the shame she felt, and the $100,000 in marital debt she had to dig out of.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

- Why so many marriages end after the kids leave home, and what the empty nest can reveal

- How losing a parent and facing your own mortality can change the way you see your marriage

- What gray divorce is, and why divorce after 50 has doubled since 1990

- Why it’s okay not to know yet: “If you wanna reconcile tomorrow, go reconcile. There is no judgment.”

- The four things every divorce comes down to: assets, support, parenting and custody

- Why a good settlement is one where “nobody’s happy, but everybody can live with it”

- How a consultation with a divorce attorney can help you understand your rights before you decide anything

- Why the identity shift, from taking off your rings to hearing “Just one?”, can be as hard as the financial hit

Jenny practices family law in New York, and divorce laws vary from state to state, so talk with an attorney where you live about your own situation.

If you’ve ever wondered whether your marriage can be saved or whether it’s time to go, this episode will help you think it through honestly, without shame and without judgment.

If you liked this episode, then you’ll like: The #1 Relationship Expert: Finding Real Love After 40 Is Possible with Jillian Turecki and The Narcissist Decoder: How Smart Women Get Trapped in Emotional Abuse

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FOLLOW JENNY HUTT:

- Follow Jenny on Instagram

- Follow Jenny on TikTok

- Connect with Jenny on LinkedIn

- Listen to Jenny’s podcast, Just Jenny

- Listen to Just Jenny on Spotify

- Jenny at Wisselman Harounian Family Law

- Jenny’s website

- Email Jenny for a consultation: jenny@lawjaw.com

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

- Hope Edelman on The Tamsen Show

- You Could Make This Place Beautiful by Maggie Smith

- Strangers: A Memoir of Marriage by Belle Burden

- Family law attorney Laura Wasser

- All’s Fair on Hulu

- Wisselman Harounian Family Law

- The Gray Divorce Revolution (Brown & Lin, The Journals of Gerontology, 2012)

- The Graying of Divorce: A Half Century of Change (Brown & Lin, 2022)

- Divorce attorney Sue Moss on The Tamsen Show

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Medical Disclaimer:

The information provided in this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult with a qualified healthcare professional regarding any medical concerns or treatment options. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of The Tamsen Show.
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Ever been told you're too much, too different, or too late? Misty Copeland heard it all and became a legend anyway. In this episode, she shares how to stop shrinking to fit, how to speak up for yourself even when the room isn't built for you, and what she's learned about perimenopause and a body that changes every day.

Sitting down with Tamsen Fadal on The Tamsen Show, Misty looks back on a career built on proving people wrong. She didn't take her first ballet class until 13, was told she was "too athletic," and still became the first Black woman promoted to principal dancer at American Ballet Theatre. She tells Tamsen how she rehearsed hard conversations before walking into the director's office, danced Firebird at the Met on six stress fractures, and gave her farewell performance with ABT in October 2025. After a full hip replacement in December 2025, she was performing at the Oscars three months later. And when Tamsen asks about perimenopause, Misty admits she was skeptical "until it hit me."

In this episode, you'll learn:

- How to stop shrinking yourself to fit someone else's idea of "right"

- How to speak up when the room isn't built for you, and how to prepare for those hard conversations first

- Why a late start doesn't have to hold you back

- How to find a safe place, and the mentors, who help you grow

- What perimenopause can really feel like, and why not all symptoms look the same

- How to be patient with a body that changes every day

- How to take on something new after a setback, one step at a time: "Let's see what happens"

- How to use your seat at the table to open doors for the women coming after you

If you've ever been made to feel like you don't fit, this conversation will remind you that you get to decide what's next.

If you liked this episode, then you'll like: How This Woman Became a Trailblazing Airline Pilot at 50 After Waiting 15 Years and “It Can't Rain Forever”: Kandi Burruss on Reinvention and What Comes Next

If you want a say on our upcoming guests, fill out ⁠this form

Stay connected with Tamsen:

⁠⁠⁠⁠Get ⁠Tamsen's newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠ filled with free tools⁠ to living better, feeling stronger, and knowing you’re never alone

Get Tamsen’s NYT instant bestselling book, ⁠⁠⁠⁠How To Menopause⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠Free Resources⁠⁠⁠⁠ from Tamsen

Watch all the episodes on ⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow Tamsen on ⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠

The Tamsen Show on ⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow Tamsen on ⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠

FOLLOW MISTY COPELAND:

- Follow Misty on Instagram

- Follow Misty on TikTok

- Misty’s website

- The Misty Copeland Foundation

- Follow the Misty Copeland Foundation on Instagram

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

- American Ballet Theatre

- The Misty Copeland Foundation’s BE BOLD program

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Medical Disclaimer:

The information provided in this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult with a qualified healthcare professional regarding any medical concerns or treatment options. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of The Tamsen Show.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Bethany Joy Lenz, star of One Tree Hill and author of the new novel The Betrayal of Cora Wexford, spent years on TV every week while secretly living inside a cult.

She opens up about why becoming a mother gave her the reason to leave, why the leaving was survival and the real healing came after, and how being on set kept her grounded through it all.

Tamsen and Joy talk about why so many capable women end up doubting themselves, why psychological abuse behind closed doors is so rarely taken seriously, and how her new novel, set in 1888, mirrors so much of her real life.

In this episode, you'll learn:

- How a good thing can slowly turn into control

- Her rule now: "If you feel like something's weird, it's weird"

- The 1 question that reveals how someone really treats you, and the response to watch for

- How to trust your gut again after years of second-guessing yourself

- What her late ADHD diagnosis taught her about how hyperactivity shows up in women

If you liked this episode, listen to: The Narcissist Decoder: How Smart Women Get Trapped in Emotional Abuse

If you want a say on our upcoming guests, fill out ⁠this form

Stay connected with Tamsen:

⁠⁠⁠⁠Get ⁠Tamsen's newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠ filled with free tools⁠ to living better, feeling stronger, and knowing you’re never alone

Get Tamsen’s NYT instant bestselling book, ⁠⁠⁠⁠How To Menopause⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠Free Resources⁠⁠⁠⁠ from Tamsen

Watch all the episodes on ⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow Tamsen on ⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠

The Tamsen Show on ⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow Tamsen on ⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow Joy on Instagram

Visit Joy's website

Get Joy's debut novel, The Betrayal of Cora Wexford

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Medical Disclaimer:

The information provided in this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult with a qualified healthcare professional regarding any medical concerns or treatment options. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of The Tamsen Show.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Most of us have been taught that when something is not working, the answer is more discipline, more willpower, and more effort. Angela Duckworth, the University of Pennsylvania psychologist and bestselling author of Grit, built her career studying that idea. Her new book, Situated, asks us to look at everything surrounding that effort.

In this conversation, she explains how the people, places, objects, and cultures around us shape our motivation, behavior, and even who we become.

Angela shares the terrifying moment she nearly lost her mother during a snorkeling trip—and why it taught her to stop fighting the current and ask for help. She also opens up about a difficult period in her marriage that showed her how easily we can mistake the effects of someone’s circumstances for flaws in their character.

Tamsen and Angela discuss why we attach moral value to doing things the hard way, how the people closest to us change what feels possible, and where to begin when we cannot simply leave the job, home, or situation shaping us.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

- Why trying harder can keep us trapped in a losing situation

- The four parts of your environment to examine when you feel stuck

- How objects within three feet of you influence your behavior

- Why different people bring out different versions of who you are

- What you can change when your biggest circumstances are outside your control

If you liked this episode, then you’ll like: The Real Reason You Feel Stuck (and How to Fix It) with Anna Runkle and How Friendships Can Change Your Life with Minaa B.

If you want a say on our upcoming guests, fill out ⁠this form

Stay connected with Tamsen:

⁠⁠⁠⁠Get ⁠Tamsen's newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠ filled with free tools⁠ to living better, feeling stronger, and knowing you’re never alone

Get Tamsen’s NYT instant bestselling book, ⁠⁠⁠⁠How To Menopause⁠⁠⁠⁠

⁠⁠⁠⁠Free Resources⁠⁠⁠⁠ from Tamsen

Watch all the episodes on ⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow Tamsen on ⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠

The Tamsen Show on ⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow Tamsen on ⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠

Follow Angela on Instagram

Get Angela's book, Situated: Find the People and Places That Bring Out Your Best

Sponsors:

Learn more about your ad choices, click here

Medical Disclaimer:

The information provided in this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult with a qualified healthcare professional regarding any medical concerns or treatment options. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of The Tamsen Show.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices