ADHD with Jenna Free

ADHD Regulation Groups are now open! - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/groups
You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide
Chapters
00:00 Introduction: Not Regulating for Regulation's Sake
01:30 ADHD Regulation Groups Are Open
03:00 Why "Should" Never Sustains Motivation
05:00 Push Motivators vs Pull Motivators
07:00 The Real Question: Do I Want a Regulated Life?
08:00 Benefit #1: Blood Flow Returns to Your Brain
08:30 Benefit #2: Executive Functioning Increases
09:00 Benefit #3: Symptoms Go Down
10:00 Benefit #4: More Sustainable and Consistent Living
14:00 Benefit #5: Enjoyment (The Biggest Motivator)
18:00 Recap: What Are You Pulled Towards?
Summary
In this episode, I talk about why you shouldn't regulate just because you think you should - and what to focus on instead. I get comments saying "I know I should regulate but I don't know how" or "I should be working on it," and the key here is: regulation is not good or bad, you're not a bad person if you're dysregulated. If you're only doing it because you feel like you should, it's probably not going to end well. Just like exercise - if you're only doing it because you should, it won't stick. But if you genuinely want to feel good, strong, and have a more vibrant life, it's easier to keep up with. I break down why "shoulds" never sustain motivation - they're push motivators (running away from something) versus pull motivators (walking towards something you want). Push motivation works short-term but is unsustainable. Pull motivation keeps you going long-term. I share the 5 key benefits of ADHD regulation to help you connect with what you're actually pulled towards: (1) Blood flow returns to your prefrontal cortex so you can think clearly, (2) Executive functioning increases, (3) ADHD symptoms go down, (4) You can live in a more sustainable and consistent way instead of the frantic crash cycle, and (5) You actually enjoy your life. I share my real-life example: 7 years of being intense then doing nothing versus 2.5 years of showing up every day with no burnout in sight - less work, less stress, more productive. The real question isn't "should I regulate?" - it's "do I want a regulated life and everything that comes with that?"
Action Step
This week, ask yourself: Am I trying to regulate because I think I should, or because I genuinely want what it gives me? Connect with your pull motivators, not push motivators. Do you want clearer thinking and lower symptoms? Do you want to live sustainably instead of frantically crashing? Do you want to enjoy your life while also being productive? Hold those desires in your mind. If you can't connect with those yet, that's okay - maybe you just know you don't want what you have now (paralysis, brain fog, frantic energy). That's enough to start walking forward. But don't try to force yourself with "should" - that's a recipe for dysregulation.
Takeaways
Regulation is not good or bad - don't do it just because you think you should, that's a recipe for dysregulation and will never sustain motivation
"Shoulds" are push motivators (running away from something) which work short-term but are unsustainable - pull motivators (walking towards something you want) keep you going long-term
5 key benefits of ADHD regulation: blood flow returns to brain for clearer thinking, executive functioning increases, symptoms go down, sustainable consistent living instead of frantic crash cycle, and enjoyment of life
The frantic crash cycle is not your natural state - it's you in panic mode and dysregulation, so working on sustainability isn't going against who you are
You can have both productivity AND enjoyment - with regulation you get more productive, less stressed, and enjoy life more (not one or the other)
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Join the Regulated Approach to ADHD Tools workshop (January 19th) - https://www.adhdwithjennafree.com/toolsworkshop
You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide
Chapters
00:00 Introduction: A Regulated Approach to ADHD Tools Workshop
02:00 ADHD, Dysregulation, and Digital Overstimulation
05:00 Why Physical Tools Are More Grounding
08:00 My Paper Calendar System (3.5 Years Strong)
11:00 Why We Choose Tools (And Why That's the Problem)
14:00 Functionality Over Dopamine
16:00 Less Is More: Simplicity Is Key
19:00 Regulating vs Dysregulating Tools
Summary
In this episode, I talk about why your ADHD apps and digital tools aren't working - and what to try instead. Most ADHD conversations focus on external supports like apps, calendars, and organizational systems, but sometimes our ADHD strategies are actually making things worse. There's strong messaging out there that the more complicated the ADHD tool, the better - more features, more automation, more tech. But is this really helping? When everything lives on your phone (calendar, lists, organizational apps), it's less grounding for your nervous system, easier to forget things buried digitally, and adds to overstimulation. Digital tools mirror dysregulated thinking - fast-paced, a million folders, scrolling forever. Physical analog tools mirror regulated thinking - you can only do one thing at a time, they're softer and slower. I share my paper calendar system that I've used every single workday for 3.5 years without fail (not because I'm trying hard, but because it supports my regulation). Most ADHD tools are chosen to create motivation through dopamine, novelty, or urgency - but this motivation is unreliable and fades fast (like that bean app everyone was using). The fun will fade, the aesthetics will fade. Instead, focus purely on functionality from day one. I break down why less is more, how to find your MVP (minimum viable product), and the difference between regulating tools (visible, simple, dependable, work even when you're tired) versus dysregulating tools (live entirely on phone, too many features, require frequent setup, rely on novelty).
Action Step
This week, assess your current ADHD tools and apps. Ask yourself: Is this tool regulating or dysregulating my nervous system? Am I using this because it's functional and solves a real problem, or because it's pretty, fun, or gave me a dopamine hit when I first got it? Look for one area where you could simplify - maybe you have five calendars all over the place when you really need just one or two. Or maybe everything lives on your phone when one physical tool (like a paper calendar or simple notebook) would be more grounding. What's the MVP - the minimum viable product - that would actually solve your problem without all the extra features you're not using anyway?
Takeaways
Digital ADHD tools can be dysregulating - when everything lives on your phone, it's less grounding, easier to forget (buried digitally), and adds to overstimulation with lights, sounds, and fast-paced scrolling
Physical analog tools are more regulating because they're tactile, slower, and force you to do one thing at a time - your nervous system is primal and prefers the physical world
Most ADHD apps are chosen for dopamine, novelty, or urgency - but this motivation is unreliable and fades within 3 days to a week, which is why you keep buying new tools that don't stick
Focus purely on functionality, not aesthetics or fun - the prettiest calendar won't help if you stop using it after a week, but an ugly functional one you use every day will change your life
Less is more: simplicity is key - cut the fluff, find your MVP (minimum viable product), and make tools as simple as possible so they work even when you're tired or low energy
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Join the free "A Regulated Vision for 2026" hangout (January 8th, 10am MST) - https://www.adhdwithjennafree.com/newyears
You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide
Join the waitlist for ADHD Groups (starting January 27-28) - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/waitlist
Chapters
00:00 Introduction: Free Regulated Vision for 2026 Hangout
01:15 Identity and ADHD: How You See Yourself Changes Everything
02:35 The Stereotypical ADHD Identity Trap
04:30 Your Brain Will Fight to Keep Your Identity (Even If You Hate It)
06:00 Identity Acts as a Filter
07:15 My Non-ADHD Example: Intuitive Eating Journey
09:05 My ADHD Identity Shifts
11:00 When ADHD Is No Longer Your Personality
12:25 We Act in Ways That Confirm Who We Believe We Are
14:10 ADHDers Think They Can't Do Long-Term Things
16:00 Notice Where ADHD Language Shrinks You
17:30 Regulation Work Is For People Who Believe Change Is Possible
Summary
In this episode, I talk about ADHD identity and how the way you see yourself determines what you attempt, what you tolerate, and how you grow. Most ADHD conversations focus on symptoms, tools, and hacks - very little attention is given to identity. But here's the thing: most change doesn't fail because of effort, it fails because of identity. The stereotypical ADHD identity sounds like "ADHDers can't watch a two-minute video" or "I'm scattered, I can't focus, I do things last minute, I can't follow through." These may describe states or actions (especially when dysregulated), but they get mistaken for traits - for who we are. When we solidify these states into our identity, we stop trying to build capacity, stop trusting ourselves, and regulation feels unrealistic. Your nervous system will work hard to protect your identity, even parts you don't like. Identity acts as a filter - it determines what you notice and dismiss. If you identify as someone who can't focus, you'll unconsciously collect evidence that confirms it. This is why ADHD regulation efforts feel pointless when we think "this is just who I am." I share my journey with intuitive eating (shifting from strict dieter to intuitive eater over 10 years with zero effort now) and my ADHD journey (from "I just do things last minute, that's who I am" to identifying as someone who values slowing down and regulation). When ADHD is no longer your personality or ceiling, when symptoms and dysregulation aren't who you are, everything opens up. People stay consistent through identity, not willpower - you don't have to motivate yourself to act in character. When identity shifts, urgency-based motivation fades and positive motivators come out. Regulation work is for people who believe change is possible and are ready to expand how they see themselves.
Action Step
This week, ask yourself: How do I describe myself? What do I identify with? Do the ways I identify make regulation, growth, and the change I'm looking for easier or harder? Notice where ADHD language shrinks you - phrases like "I'm a procrastinator," "I can't focus," "I'm lazy," "I'm not motivated." These keep you stuck. Consider what shifts you might make in how you want to see yourself. Are you someone who values enjoying life? Are your actions showing that? Are you someone who believes change is possible? Start there. You don't have to change who you are, but work on how you see yourself - that's the first step before any regulation work can stick.
Takeaways
Most ADHD change doesn't fail because of effort, it fails because of identity - the way you see yourself determines what you attempt and what feels possible
Your brain fights to keep your identity even if you don't like it - going against who you believe you are feels unsafe, so if you identify as "scattered and can't focus," your system will work to keep that
Identity acts as a filter determining what you notice and dismiss - if you take criticism to heart but dismiss compliments, that's your identity at work
People stay consistent through identity, not willpower - you don't have to motivate yourself to act in character, you naturally do things that align with how you see yourself
Regulation work is for people who believe change is possible, value depth over hacks, and are ready to expand how they see themselves - not for people who want to stay inside the ADHD stereotype
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Join the free "A Regulated Vision for 2026" hangout (January 8th, 10am MST) - https://www.adhdwithjennafree.com/newyears
You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide
Join the waitlist for ADHD Groups (starting January 27 & 28) - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/waitlist
Chapters
00:00 Introduction: Why Goals Feel Exhausting
01:00 You've Only Ever Pursued Goals from a Survival State
03:00 Why Relief is Your Primary Dopamine Source
05:00 The Primal Metaphor: Running from the Bear vs Picking Berries
08:00 Why Focusing on the End Goal Keeps You Stuck
11:00 What Regulated Motivation Actually Looks Like
14:00 My Real Life Example: 7 Years Dysregulated vs 2.5 Years Regulated
17:00 Growth is a Long-Term Game
19:00 This Week's Practice: Shift from Sprint to Present
Summary
In this episode, I talk about why long-term goals feel impossible with ADHD - and how to actually change that. If goals feel exhausting, you have ideas but pursuing them feels overwhelming and anxiety-fueled, and you can't sustain anything long-term, you're likely dysregulated. Here's what's really happening: you've only ever pursued goals from a survival state, and survival state motivation is sprint motivation. When you're in fight or flight, your body isn't trying to help you grow - it's trying to help you survive or escape. The only motivation that works in that state is urgency, shame, fear, and guilt. This is why you can't start a project until the deadline is hours away, why you crash after submitting something, and why you burn out trying to fix your whole life in a weekend. I share a powerful analogy: you're trying to climb a mountain with "run from the bear" energy, but all meaningful goals require "walk the mountain path to pick berries" energy. These are two completely different nervous system modes. Most ADHDers have only ever operated in sprint mode, but all goals worth having require that steady foraging energy. I break down what keeps you stuck (focusing on completion as the only reward, needing panic to get started) and what regulated motivation actually looks like (steady, sustainable, internally rewarding, about experience not escape). I share my real-life entrepreneur example: 7 years dysregulated getting nowhere versus 2.5 years regulated building consistent momentum. The key isn't trying harder - it's working on the state of your nervous system so you can access that berry-picking energy.
Action Step
This week, when you sit down to do something (start small - even washing dishes counts), notice when you get into that sprinting energy of "I gotta get this over with." Shift it to: "For the next few minutes, I'm just going to be present with the task at hand. I'm just gonna do what I'm doing." You're teaching your nervous system: this is safe, I'm not running from a bear, I am picking berries. This disrupts that relief-driven cycle and starts building your capacity for sustainable, long-term effort. Remember: slowing down doesn't mean doing less - it means picking berries instead of running from the bear.
Takeaways
You've only ever pursued ADHD goals from a survival state, and survival motivation is sprint motivation - urgency, shame, fear, guilt - which can't sustain long-term pursuits
When dysregulated, relief is your primary dopamine source (just get it over with) versus fulfillment (I want to do this) - this is why you can't stick with goals
The analogy: you're trying to climb mountains with "run from the bear" energy when you need "walk the path to pick berries" energy - two completely different nervous system modes
Regulated motivation is steady, sustainable, internally rewarding, and about experience not escape - you can start without panic, continue without adrenaline, stop without self-judgment, and pick up again without dread
Slowing down and being present with each step (berry-picking energy) will get you to your goals more consistently than sprinting (bear energy) - sustainability beats intensity for anything meaningful
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This is a replay of our foundational Episode 1 - perfect for new listeners or anyone who wants a refresher on The ADHD Regulation Method! (Called the ADHD Reset in this episode)
You can get your free ADHD Regulation Guide here - www.adhdwithjennafree.com/adhdguide
Chapters
00:00 Rethinking ADHD: A New Perspective
11:38 The Journey to Regulation: Finding Balance
19:07 The Impact of Regulation on Daily Life
26:03 Awareness and Acceptance: The Key to Transformation
Summary
Hi! I'm Jenna Free, therapist for ADHD with ADHD here to share a transformative perspective on ADHD, emphasizing the importance of understanding that we have ADHD but we are also in fight or flight and that is the true problem. I discuss the concept of dysregulation and how ADHDers often find themselves in a chronic state of fight or flight, which can lead to feelings of overwhelm and paralysis. I am here to advocate for deeper internal work to achieve regulation and balance, moving away from superficial coping strategies. Today I am sharing my unique approach - learning the philosophy of The ADHD Reset (now called the ADHD Regulation Method) is vital in living well with ADHD. From here we will talk about how to implement this in your life and beyond.
Takeaways
ADHD should be viewed as a brain difference, not a problem.
Many (all?) ADHDers experience chronic dysregulation and fight or flight.
Superficial coping strategies are not enough for true transformation.
Awareness of dysregulation is the first step to change.
Regulation allows for a more relaxed and sustainable way of living.
Fear and shame can fuel short bursts of energy but are not sustainable.
Finding balance is key to managing ADHD symptoms effectively.
The journey to regulation involves internal work and acceptance.
Enjoyment of life should be the ultimate goal, not just productivity.
Transformation is possible with the right approach and mindset.
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