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The Divorce Course Podcast

Laura & Lyn
The Divorce Course Podcast
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  • The Post-Divorce Glow-Up: Steps to Emotional Recovery after Abuse
    🎧 Listen to this episode if… 💔 You’ve left an abusive relationship but still feel stuck, numb, or confused. 🧠 You’re trying to understand why you still feel controlled, scared, or exhausted. 💬 You want to know what healing actually looks like and how long it takes. 💪 You’re ready to start finding yourself again after years of walking on eggshells. 🌸 You want to rebuild your confidence, identity, and hope for the future. 💫 You just need to hear that full recovery is possible ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This episode discusses family violence, coercive control, and trauma recovery. 📌 Disclaimer: This episode is for general information and education only. Please seek your own legal, psychological, or medical support for your specific circumstances. Leaving an abusive relationship doesn’t mean the pain or confusion stops overnight. In this heartfelt episode, Laura and Lyn are joined by clinical psychologist Krazi Kirova, who specialises in trauma recovery and emotional abuse. Together, they explore what happens after you leave  the emotional crash, the exhaustion, and eventually, the glow-up. You’ll learn what the research says about post-separation abuse, why healing takes time, and the eight key stages of recovery every survivor eventually moves through. Krazi shares powerful, evidence-based insights on rebuilding safety, identity, and connection  and why the “post-divorce glow-up” you see online is about so much more than appearance. If you’re in that stage where you feel broken, tired, and unsure of who you are  this episode is for you. It’s about hope, self-reclamation, and the small steps that slowly lead to peace, power, and joy again. ⏱️ Episode Timeline – The Post-Divorce Glow-Up: Healing After Abuse 00:00 – Introduction: Leaving abuse and why the pain doesn’t stop overnight 01:00 – Support reminder: Lifeline, 1800 RESPECT, and why safety comes first 02:00 – What keeps you stuck after leaving an abusive partner 03:00 – Why recovery can’t begin until you feel physically and emotionally safe 05:00 – The psychological “hurricane” of separation — and why it gets worse before it gets better 07:00 – Understanding post-separation abuse and coercive control 09:00 – How predictability helps survivors regain power and calm 11:00 – How courts are improving in recognising coercive control and trauma 12:00 – The physical and emotional depletion from years of abuse 13:00 – The “post-divorce glow-up” — and why your energy eventually returns 17:00 – How long does it really take to heal after abuse? 18:00 – What research says about recovery — it’s not linear 19:00 – The 8 key tasks for healing and recovery 20:00 – Step 1: Establishing safety — physical, emotional, and financial 22:00 – Step 2: Educating yourself and re-examining the relationship 25:00 – Step 3: Rebuilding identity — remembering who you are 29:00 – Step 4: Rebuilding social connections and support networks 32:00 – Step 5: Being selective about who you let in — healthy relationships only 33:00 – Step 6: Taking time before dating again 35:00 – Step 7: Embracing freedom, autonomy, and decision-making 38:00 – Step 8: Accepting recovery as a process — patience and self-kindness 42:00 – Courts and trauma-informed change in the family law system 44:00 – Step 9: Healing mentally and physically — reconnecting with your body 46:00 – The power of community, spirituality, and belonging in recovery 47:00 – Final reflections: “It’s a journey — and you are getting somewhere.” Resources Mentioned: 🧩 Kirova Psychology – Personal Resources https://kirovapsychology.com.au/personal-resources/  📑 Free Disclosure Checklist https://www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/disclosurechecklist 💻 The Divorce Course Free Resources https://www.thedivorcecourse.com.au Related Episodes: 🎙️ Is It Emotional Abuse? https://open.spotify.com/episode/3Vjl0I9xXUQruoAQKLVh11 Is it emotional abuse?  https://open.spotify.com/episode/2bSCQ3JdcU4xxW7D4LJUxG?si=VV8mR7aYS7uJYstTMYwZvg   Divorcing an abuser https://open.spotify.com/episode/21TpYbC15VJt9lnb82Ub13?si=lonuOpx8Q22ZRrKKbArc0g 🎙️ Mediation or Manipulation? https://open.spotify.com/episode/4P1DjaMtXTq2sbel4qywew  🎙️ When Mediation Goes Wrong (And What You Can Do Next) https://open.spotify.com/episode/4WQhunLQVtWn02k5FT7Mpv 🎙️ The Narcissist Playbook https://open.spotify.com/episode/00kTon70LllVE97X8zn9vK   🚨 Support Services (Australia): 1800 RESPECT – Family Violence Support Lifeline 13 11 14 – Crisis Support Police – Call 000 if you are in danger ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This episode discusses family violence, coercive control, and situations that may feel unsafe. 📌 Legal Disclaimer: This episode is for general information only and is not legal advice. Please seek your own legal support for your specific circumstances.
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  • Mediation Made Easier: 5 Things to Prepare So You Don’t Freeze, Fold, or Fail
    🎧 Listen to this episode if… 💬 You’ve got mediation coming up and don’t know where to start. 😰 You’re feeling stressed or unprepared to face your ex about custody or property. 📑 You want to know what to bring and how to prepare your documents. ⚖️ You need tips for negotiating calmly and confidently. 🚩 You’re dealing with a high-conflict or manipulative ex. 💸 You want to avoid costly mistakes and stay out of family court. 🧠 You just want to feel ready and in control on the day. ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This episode discusses family violence, coercive control, and situations that may feel unsafe. 📌 Legal Disclaimer: This episode is for general information only and is not legal advice. Please seek your own legal support for your specific circumstances. You’re about to head into mediation and the very thought of it makes your palms sweat. Maybe someone just mentioned “mediation” and now you’re spiraling — wondering what to say, what to bring, and how to keep calm. This episode is for you if you want to feel confident, organised, and prepared (instead of panicked) before you sit down at that mediation table. Mum ( a family lawyer with over 35 years experience) and I walk you through the Top 5 things you need to do before mediation — practical, emotional, and strategic prep that will make a huge difference on the day. These aren’t just lawyer tips — they’re the real-world insights we’ve seen help countless people get through mediation feeling calmer, clearer, and more in control. We’ll talk about what to do if your ex is high-conflict, avoidant, manipulative, or genuinely amicable; how to prepare your documents and disclosure; and why it’s so important to have a plan for both success and failure. Plus, we touch on how to handle mediation safely if there’s been family violence Free Disclosure Checklist https://www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/disclosurechecklist ⏱️ Episode Timeline – Mediation Preparation Tips 00:00 – What Is Mediation in Family Law? A clear introduction to how mediation works in divorce and separation cases. 01:24 – Meet the Hosts: Family Law and Divorce Experts Get to know your guides as they break down practical mediation strategies. 01:44 – Listener Stories and Divorce Mediation Experiences Real listener insights and why mediation can be both powerful and stressful. 03:18 – Understanding the Mediation Process in Divorce What happens during family law mediation — and how to get the best outcome. 05:17 – How to Prepare for Mediation: Know What You Want (and Don’t Want) Tips for identifying your priorities before stepping into the room. 14:27 – Creating Your Divorce Negotiation Plan Learn how to build a negotiation strategy based on your goals and your ex’s personality type. 23:06 – What Documents to Bring to Mediation Essential paperwork and evidence to prepare for property or parenting mediation. 24:09 – Court-Ordered Mediation and Section 60I Certificates Explained What happens if mediation is required before going to court. 27:24 – How to Write a Confidential Case Outline for Mediation Preparing your case outline to stay focused and calm. 28:28 – Preparing for Financial Disclosure in Mediation How to gather, label, and present financial documents effectively. 33:30 – Planning for Mediation Outcomes (Success or Failure) What to do if mediation works — or doesn’t. 41:59 – Mediation and Family Violence: How to Stay Safe When to use shuttle mediation, safety plans, or legal support. 45:13 – The Top 5 Tips to Prepare for Family Law Mediation Our biggest takeaways to help you walk in calm and confident. 48:41 – Final Thoughts, Resources, and Next Steps How to keep moving forward after mediation — whatever the outcome.   Resources Central Practice Directions https://www.fcfcoa.gov.au/fl/pd/fam-cpd Free Disclosure Checklist https://www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/disclosurechecklist Episode Links MEDIATION OR MANIPULATION https://open.spotify.com/episode/4P1DjaMtXTq2sbel4qywew?si=t8swCVk2SoG6xaqE9I-D9Q   Can you really mediate with a narcissist https://open.spotify.com/episode/3Vjl0I9xXUQruoAQKLVh11?si=MlD8Ku1FS02PjjLjjnlokw   Do you need a lawyer for mediation? https://open.spotify.com/episode/37Zn59zn6sVlBIU0kePY7K?si=8Ih-0c5cRLuCKOPbzVVrqw   When Mediation goes wrong and what you can do next https://open.spotify.com/episode/4WQhunLQVtWn02k5FT7Mpv?si=h9rJo77PR3qG7_YV9obAuQ   What happens after mediation - what if you change your mind https://open.spotify.com/episode/00kTon70LllVE97X8zn9vK?si=EmjV30k1SQWp7IcqX9Yz4Q   🚨 Support Services: 1800 RESPECT (Family Violence Support – Australia) Lifeline: 13 11 14 (Crisis Support – Australia) ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This episode discusses family violence, coercive control, and situations that may feel unsafe. 📌 Legal Disclaimer: This episode is for general information only and is not legal advice. Please seek your own legal support for your specific circumstances.  
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  • Percentages in Divorce Property Settlements Explained
    Listen to This Episode If You… 🏠 Have been told divorce property settlements are always 50/50 🤔 Want to understand how contributions (financial and non-financial) are weighed ⚖️ Are trying to figure out how your future needs affect your share 💰 Suspect your ex has wasted or hidden money and want to know what that means 📝 Need to know whether you can work out percentages yourself or need a lawyer 🧾 Are preparing for mediation or property negotiations and want strategies to stay strong 👶 Want to know how parenting responsibilities and children’s needs affect percentages Episode Summary Property settlements in divorce aren’t as simple as “split it down the middle.” In this episode, Laura and her mum Lyn (a seasoned family lawyer) unpack the myths and realities of percentages in property settlement. They break down how the Family Court in Australia actually calculates shares based on contributions, circumstances, and future needs — and why different lawyers might give you slightly different numbers. You’ll also learn why percentages aren’t always the best way to negotiate, and why focusing on dollar amounts and assets can be more effective. If you’re heading into mediation, dealing with a high-conflict ex, or just trying to understand what’s “fair,” this episode gives you some clarity into the confusing word of property settlements. ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This episode discusses family violence, coercive control, and financial abuse. 📌 Legal Disclaimer: This podcast is for general information only. It is not legal advice. Always seek independent legal advice about your situation. ⏱️ Episode Timeline – Divorce Property Settlements Explained 00:00 – What is a Divorce Property Settlement and How Does It Work in Australia? 00:09 – How Are Percentages Calculated in Divorce Property Settlements? 01:08 – Legal Disclaimer: Why You Must Get Independent Legal Advice in Divorce 02:02 – What Are the Basics of Property Division in Australian Family Law? 02:57 – What Does the Court Consider When Dividing Property After Divorce? 04:58 – Key Factors That Affect Your Property Settlement Percentage 17:21 – Divorce Case Study: What We Can Learn from Shaman 2025 21:59 – How Do Recent Legal Changes Affect Divorce Property Settlements? 24:06 – Practical Tips and Resources for Divorce Property Negotiations 25:55 – What Evidence Do You Need for Court in a Property Settlement? 26:17 – Mediation vs Negotiation: Which Works Best in the Property Division? 29:00 – How to Work Out Percentages in a Divorce Property Settlement 32:14 – Common Mistakes to Avoid in Divorce Property Division 38:10 – What Case Law and Legal Precedents Say About Divorce Property Splits 47:05 – Final Thoughts: How to Protect Yourself in a Property Settlement Resources & Links 📥 Download the Separation Under One Roof Checklist – available free to newsletter subscribers. Shamon & Shamon [2025] FedCFamC1A 150 (8 September 2025) https://www.austlii.edu.au/cgi-bin/viewdoc/au/cases/cth/FedCFamC1A/2025/150.html Section 79 of the Family Law Act https://classic.austlii.edu.au/au/legis/cth/consol_act/fla1975114/s79.html Dajani & Dajani [2025] FedCFamC1A 28 (26 February 2025) https://www.austlii.edu.au/cgi-bin/viewdoc/au/cases/cth/FedCFamC1A/2025/28.html 🚨 Support Services: 1800 RESPECT (Family Violence Support – Australia) Lifeline: 13 11 14 (Crisis Support – Australia) 🎧 Related Episodes: Wastage in Divorce https://open.spotify.com/episode/0wKQog5jOCTqcCT0QowM2H?si=eoHt8lGRR2ualABIbxn4yw Super Split Myths https://open.spotify.com/episode/3JfL6ph18XP3ZI78UGWwqV?si=Y8m2eXJTQO-mGlY7rJSOjA The pitfalls of percentage negotiations https://open.spotify.com/episode/6bxTgrdymCeW16Q7z5njUe?si=CvJts4NJQTCym7aVljaprw Divorce Decisions : Settling vs Court https://open.spotify.com/episode/5CzRfpKm6WjRhMecZqGZPy?si=Fl-B4jxfSeinxcgSDBI_kg 🔑 Key Topics Discussed Why property settlements are not automatically 50/50 How financial and non-financial contributions are considered The role of future and current circumstances under the Family Law Act How courts now deal with wastage and hidden assets Why lawyers may calculate percentages differently The risks of negotiating in percentages instead of dollars and assets Tips for handling high-conflict exes in property settlement discussions  
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  • The Hidden Connection: Custody Battles & Property Splits in Divorce
    🎧 Listen to This Episode If You… ✨ Are in the middle of property and custody negotiations ⚖️ Have an ex who’s threatened to push for more custody unless you agree to property terms 🏡 Want to understand how family courts consider housing and children’s needs in property settlement 😟 Are worried about being pressured or manipulated during mediation 💡 Want practical strategies to protect your kids’ best interests and your financial future   ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This episode discusses family violence, coercive control, and situations that may feel unsafe. 📌 Legal Disclaimer: This episode is for general information only and is not legal advice. Please seek your own legal support for your specific circumstances. The Hidden Connection: Custody Battles & Property Splits Custody and property are supposed to be separate issues in divorce — but are they really? In this powerful episode, we discuss the hidden connection between parenting arrangements and property settlement that many people don’t realize until it’s too late. We discuss how the Australian Family Court FCFCOA actually factors in who the primary carer is, the housing needs of children, and why having custody can impact the percentage you receive in a property split. More importantly, we explore what happens when your ex tries to use the kids as bargaining chips — and some strategies you can use to protect yourself and your children. If you’ve ever felt pressured to trade property for custody or worried that your ex is using threats of “50/50 care” to get more of the financial pool, this episode is for you. ⏱️ Episode Timeline – What We Discuss: [00:00] Introduction: Custody and Property – The Hidden Connection in Divorce [01:31] Do Custody Arrangements Impact Property Settlement in Family Law? [03:36] Why Housing Needs of Children Affect Property Division [06:50] Can You Keep the Family Home for the Kids After Divorce? [08:28] When Exes Use Custody as a Bargaining Chip in Property Negotiations [11:00] What to Do if Your Ex Threatens 50/50 Custody to Get More Property [13:11] Why Judges Care About Evidence, Chronologies, and Child-Focused Behavior [16:07] Spotting Red Flags: Custody Demands Tied to Property or Child Support [21:00] How Lawyers and Mediators Handle Custody-Property Tradeoffs [25:38] When Exes Suddenly ‘Step Up’ Parenting for Strategic Reasons [28:12] Negotiation Strategies: Staying Child-Focused While Protecting Property [31:32] Best Interests of the Child: What Section 60CC of the Family Law Act Really Says [39:00] Avoidant vs High-Conflict Exes: How Property Battles Play Out Differently [44:00] Why Documentation and Chronologies Are Your Best Defense [46:00] Final Thoughts: Staying Child-Focused and Resilient Through Divorce Resources & Links 🚨 Support Services: 1800 RESPECT (Family Violence Support – Australia) Lifeline: 13 11 14 (Crisis Support – Australia) 🎧 Related Episodes: Primary Carer Episode https://open.spotify.com/episode/6oZAEkj18NEcUfJPXP0FOT?si=9rZ-jNzwQfSYl0naMgUMnA Section 60cc Best Interests of the Children https://classic.austlii.edu.au/au/legis/cth/consol_act/fla1975114/s60cc.html   Mediation or Manipulation https://open.spotify.com/episode/4P1DjaMtXTq2sbel4qywew?si=ao8KrQ4PTZuusYrkmMZGUw ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This episode discusses family violence, coercive control, and situations that may feel unsafe. 📌 Legal Disclaimer: This episode is for general information only and is not legal advice. Please seek your own legal support for your specific circumstances.
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  • Stuck Under One Roof After Break Up or Divorce: What Are The Options?
    🎧 Listen to This Episode If You… You’re separated but can’t afford to move out of the family home. You’re afraid leaving means you’ll lose your rights to the house. Your ex refuses to cooperate, acknowledge the separation, or leave. You’re experiencing coercive control or financial abuse after separation.   Episode Summary Separation is hard enough — but what happens when you and your ex are still living under the same roof? For many, moving out simply isn’t an option: finances are tight, safety is uncertain, and myths about “losing the house” keep people trapped in toxic or unsafe environments. In this episode, we break down the realities of separation under one roof — what the family court in Australia considers what risks and protections you need to know about, and what practical steps you can take if you’re stuck. From safety planning to financial concerns, we’ll tackle the most common fears people have when their ex refuses to leave or makes life impossible at home. We’ll also bust some of the biggest myths, including the idea that leaving the family home means you “lose it forever.” Spoiler: that’s not how property settlements work. ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This episode discusses family violence, coercive control, and situations that may feel unsafe. 📌 Legal Disclaimer: This episode is for general information only and is not legal advice. Please seek your own legal support for your specific circumstances.    ⏱ Episode Timeline – Separation Under One Roof 00:00 – Introduction: What to Do If You’re Still Living With Your Ex After Separation 00:43 – Common Concerns in Divorce: “I’m Stuck Under One Roof With My Ex” 02:36 – What Does Separation Under One Roof Mean in Family Law? 03:57 – Divorce Myths: Does Leaving the House Mean You Lose Property Rights? 05:22 – Financial Traps in Divorce: How to Afford Living Separately 11:53 – Sole Occupancy Orders Explained: Forcing an Ex to Leave the Family Home 14:06 – Divorce Conflict: How to Deal With an Uncooperative or Controlling Ex 19:31 – Domestic Violence & Divorce: Creating Safety Plans While Living Together 25:04 – Court Orders and Safety Concerns When Separated Under One Roof 25:52 – Property Settlements in Divorce: How Renovations and Contributions Are Treated 28:41 – Divorce Property Division: What Courts Think About Home Improvements 32:31 – Post-Separation Manipulation: Recognising Coercive Control Tactics 35:13 – Children and Divorce: How Living Arrangements Affect Custody Decisions 40:29 – Separation Under One Roof Checklist: Key Questions to Protect Yourself 46:35 – Final Tips: Legal Support and Resources Available 📥 Download the Separation Under One Roof Checklist – available free to newsletter subscribers. 🚨 Support Services: 1800 RESPECT (Family Violence Support – Australia) Lifeline: 13 11 14 (Crisis Support – Australia) 🎧 Related Episodes: DAVIS http://classic.austlii.edu.au/au/cases/cth/FamCA/1982/73.html Factor 79(5)f https://classic.austlii.edu.au/au/legis/cth/consol_act/fla1975114/s79.html How to Prove Separation Under One Roof https://open.spotify.com/episode/2IXSOZ8vVadbcrq10DuxG0 Who Pays the Mortgage After Separation? https://open.spotify.com/episode/4wPpEArmCbxKGXL5Czgm48?si=R_ECqP68QHu8DpyoJK_23Q Separation Survival: Boundaries Under One Roof https://open.spotify.com/episode/57GwZsRSE1IO8WYfLuvMNH?si=jcHw01X7QiuWYIihmY1_jQ 📌 Legal Disclaimer: This episode is for general information only and is not legal advice. Please seek your own legal support for your specific circumstances. 
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About The Divorce Course Podcast

The Divorce Course Podcast is hosted by mother–daughter duo Laura Furiosi and family law specialist Lyn Galvin. Together, they break down the complex world of separation and divorce into clear, practical, and empowering conversations. From property settlements and parenting arrangements to dealing with difficult exes, finances, and family court, the podcast gives listeners the knowledge, tools, and confidence to navigate divorce without feeling lost or alone.
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