Crappy to Happy

Why do some people go through trauma and come out the other side better for it?

Dr Edith Shiro has been asking that question since she was a child. One set of her grandparents survived the Holocaust, the other walked from Syria to Israel with six children, and she grew up in a community of immigrants in Venezuela where she watched people respond to upheaval in very different ways. Some stayed stuck in survival mode. Others went well beyond recovering, starting organisations and communities and finding a whole new appreciation for life.

That curiosity became her life's work. Edith is now a clinical psychologist in Miami with more than 25 years working in trauma, and in her book The Unexpected Gift of Trauma she maps out a five-stage process of post-traumatic growth that anyone can move through. We talk about what trauma actually is (her definition is broader than you might expect) and why being resilient can sometimes get in the way of growing. We also get into whether you have to hit rock bottom before anything shifts, and why the people you choose to confide in make such a difference.

Edith doesn't pretend any of this is easy. Most people only start this process because they've run out of other options. But it's such a hopeful message, especially if you're in the middle of something hard right now. As I said in the last episode, never let a good crisis go to waste.

What you'll learn:
The three groups of people Edith noticed growing up, and what set the third group apart
A broader definition of trauma that explains why two people can go through the same event and respond so differently
How resilience can sometimes keep you from growing (and what it takes to go further)
Why not being believed can hurt more than the event itself, and how to choose who you confide in
Dr Edith's five stages of post-traumatic growth
When finding a new purpose after a crisis is growth, and when it's a way of avoiding the pain
How beliefs born from family trauma get passed down, and how you can choose which ones to keep

Resources mentioned:

The Unexpected Gift of Trauma by Dr Edith Shiro (available in Australia and the UK)
The Unexpected Gift of Trauma workbook, with activities, meditations and videos for each stage
Dr Edith's self-paced post-traumatic growth certification for mental health professionals
Edith's website: https://www.dredithshiro.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.edithshiro
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/dr.edithshiro
Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl
Connect with Cass:
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www.instagram.com/cassdunn_xo

Contact Crappy to Happy:

Email: hello@crappytohappypod.com
www.crappytohappypod.com
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When a crisis turns your world upside down, what do you do? Last week we talked about how to make a big decision. This week I'm talking about when the decision gets made for you. You lose the job or the relationship or the house, or you get a diagnosis you didn't see coming, and suddenly the change you never asked for is here and completely out of your control.

One of my favourite quotes is 'never let a good crisis go to waste'. I'm not asking you to look for a silver lining while you're in the thick of it. But a crisis can also be a rare opportunity to re-examine everything and decide what you want to rebuild, and it's the moment you find out how much of your personal growth work holds up under pressure.

I'm sharing what you can do to give yourself the best chance of coming out of this situation stronger. If you're going through something hard right now, or looking back on it, I hope this gives you something to hold on to.

What you'll learn
Why you can feel relieved and devastated at the same time, and both are valid
What a crisis reveals about how far you've really come
How fight, flight, freeze and fawn show up when things fall apart
The attitudes researchers have linked to growth after adversity
What changes in your body and mood when you see stress as a good thing
Why your mood in a crisis makes a lousy fortune teller
The questions to ask yourself about what to rebuild from the rubble

Resources mentioned
Last week's episode on making a big decision when you're overthinking it: https://crappytohappypod.com/s18e1
Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl

If you enjoyed this episode, hit follow wherever you listen so you never miss one. If you know someone going through something hard, please share it with them. And I'd love it if you left a five-star rating and review. ⭐️
Connect with Cass:
www.cassdunn.com
www.instagram.com/cassdunn_xo

Contact Crappy to Happy:

Email: hello@crappytohappypod.com
www.crappytohappypod.com
www.instagram.com/crappytohappypod
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Stuck on a big life decision? Let’s talk about the psychology of decision making. Whether you're weighing up a job, relationship, starting a business or buying a house, big decisions have a way of keeping you stuck on the fence. In this episode I'm explaining why your pros and cons list is no help, and how your predictions of how happy you'll be depending on what you decide are wildly unreliable, and why we usually default to the status quo even if it makes us miserable rather than take a risk on the unknown.

If you're going around in circles on whether to make a change or take the plunge, tune in to hear which information you should discard and what to pay attention to if you want to come to a decision that gives you the best chance of satisfaction in the long term.

What you'll learn:

Why change feels so hard, even when you want it
The reason your pros and cons list is not helping you at all
The science of predicting how you'll feel in the future (and how much we underestimate our own resilience)
what happened when 22,000 people let a coin toss decide for them
The decision making formula that is most likely to get you closer to an outcome you'll be happy with.
Connect with Cass:
www.cassdunn.com
www.instagram.com/cassdunn_xo

Contact Crappy to Happy:

Email: hello@crappytohappypod.com
www.crappytohappypod.com
www.instagram.com/crappytohappypod
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's nice to feel content, peaceful and satisfied with life. But how long do you let yourself feel any of those things before you get twitchy?

Let's talk about why you might find it so challenging to allow yourself to feel content. It might be guilt, or a fear that you'll get complacent, a history of struggle that makes peace feel foreign to you, or a core belief that you're not worthy or deserving of ease.

Takeaways:

The difference between contentment and happiness
How our conditioning to strive and achieve makes rest feel like a threat
Why your brain might resist pleasant feelings
Why joy and peace can feel uncomfortable when you try to access them
The worthiness blocks that keep you from feeling okay with your own life
How waiting for the worst robs you of joy
Why cultivating contentment from the inside is the only version that lasts

Connect with Cass:
www.cassdunn.com
www.instagram.com/cassdunn_xo

Contact Crappy to Happy:

Email: hello@crappytohappypod.com
www.crappytohappypod.com
www.instagram.com/crappytohappypod
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If you’re feeling a little bored and uninspired, I get it. I noticed recently that after 9 years of podcasting, ideas were not flowing and creativity felt like a chore. (This is normal of course.) But after spending two days out of the office at The Podcast Show last week, I’ve discovered renewed enthusiasm.

I realised that getting out of my bubble was exactly what I needed, so I’m sharing some ideas that might help you tap into some of that inspiration and spark up your interest and energy again. Whether you work for yourself, work from home, or just spend a lot of time alone at a laptop, there is some science that can point us in the right direction. I’m sharing some of that science, some practical ideas, and things that have helped me personally.

What you'll learn

What's happening in your brain when you're in a rut - and why pushing harder often makes it worse
Why getting out of your usual environment does more than change the scenery (there's actual neuroscience here)
How to engineer novel experiences without booking a flight (by all means, feel free to also book a flight)
Why being around people who can help is the first thing we cut when when we're busy - and why that's a mistake
Simple ways to shift your workspace and change your energy
Why your brain generates better ideas when it has space to breathe - and how to give it that
Connect with Cass:
www.cassdunn.com
www.instagram.com/cassdunn_xo

Contact Crappy to Happy:

Email: hello@crappytohappypod.com
www.crappytohappypod.com
www.instagram.com/crappytohappypod
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.