Neurodiversity Podcast

David Smith spent years working as a therapist specializing in neurodiversity-affirming care, but it wasn't until age 56, prompted by his wife and his own clients, that he sought his own autism diagnosis. That confirmation fundamentally shifted his clinical approach from that of a white-coated expert to a fellow traveler, deepening the way he accompanies families through unmapped territory.
Today, Emily and David discuss the delicate balance between professional curiosity and humility, and why traditional therapeutic models often fail to support the fragile nervous systems of neurodivergent clients. They talk about the nuances of demand avoidance, specifically the high-masking, internalized presentation that often looks like perfectionism, and why "connection before correction" is a neurological necessity, not just a catchy phrase.
TAKEAWAYS
Effective therapy for neurodivergent clients often requires shifting away from the traditional expert hierarchy.

The neurodivergent brain is a "complicated, custom-made car with no user's manual."

For neurodivergent nervous systems, stress isn't just negative trauma; it includes any destabilizing experience, including excitement and joy.

While we often associate PDA with external defiance, the internalized profile often manifests as high-achieving perfectionism.

Rewards and consequences often backfire with neurodivergent children because they increase anxiety.

It's ineffective to offer a correction to a child until you have connected with them.

There is a massive overlap between complex trauma and neurodivergence.

A late diagnosis doesn't instantly fix struggles; it initiates a complex grieving and reframing process.

Join our live CE training, Adapting Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy for Autistic and ADHD Pediatric Clients, Friday morning, January 23, at 10:30 eastern/7:30 pacific, or get the recorded version anytime after. Get signed up or learn more here.
David Smith, LCSW is a late-diagnosed autistic therapist and licensed clinical social worker specializing in neurodiversity-affirming care for autistic and otherwise neurodivergent individuals and their families. Practicing since 2017, David opened his private telehealth practice in 2023 and now serves clients across five states from his home in southern Oregon. In addition to therapy, he offers consultation, writing, education, and advocacy to expand access to effective, affirming support for the neurodivergent community.
Diagnosed with autism in 2024 at age 56 (thanks in part to gentle nudges from his wife and clients) David continues to explore how his autistic identity shapes both his personal and professional life. His work is deeply rooted in curiosity, humility, and a commitment to learning from his clients and the broader neurodivergent community. He is also a devoted listener of this and other neurodivergence-focused podcasts. David lives with his wife, a fellow therapist originally from Peru, and is the proud father of three sons.
BACKGROUND READING
David's website, LinkedIn, authored articles
The Neurodiversity Podcast is on Facebook, Instagram, BlueSky, and you're invited to join our Facebook Group. For more information go to www.NeurodiversityPodcast.com.
If you'd like members of your organization, school district, or company to know more about the subjects discussed on our podcast, Emily Kircher-Morris provides keynote addresses, workshops, and training sessions worldwide, in-person or virtually. You can choose from a list of established presentations, or work with Emily to develop a custom talk to fit your unique situation. To learn more, visit our website.

"Parent the child you have," is a common piece of advice in the neurodiversity community, but what does it actually look like in practice when stress is high and patience is low? Why do traditional consequences often fail to build the skills a child actually needs? And how can parents distinguish between enabling a child and truly supporting them? Today, Emily Kircher-Morris talks with Cindy Goldrich, founder of PTS Coaching, and author of Eight Keys to Parenting Kids and Teens with ADHD, about the developmental reality of executive dysfunction and why "calm is power" when it comes to parenting complex kids.
TAKEAWAYS
"Parenting the child you have" requires letting go of the expectations of who you thought they would be and getting curious about who they actually are.

Executive function is a developmental process, and the human brain often isn't fully mature until age 25 to 30.

Intelligence and executive function are separate traits; a high IQ does not guarantee a child will have the ability to organize or self-regulate.

Enabling is defined as doing something for a child without a plan to help them eventually do it for themselves.

Stress physically restricts access to the prefrontal cortex, making executive function skills harder to access in high-pressure moments.

ADHD is fundamentally a delay in the development of executive function skills, sometimes by as much as 30%.

Oppositional behavior (often labeled ODD) is frequently a result of emotional dysregulation rather than a calculated choice to be difficult.

A parent's ability to remain calm is their greatest power in helping a dysregulated child.

Here's the link to register for the continuing education training on January 23, "Adapting Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy for Autistic and ADHD Pediatric Clients."
Cindy Goldrich, Ed.M., ADHD-CCSP is a leading expert in ADHD and executive function support, and the founder of PTS Coaching. She is the author of 8 Keys to Parenting Kids & Teens with ADHD, and co-author of ADHD, Executive Function & Behavioral Challenges in the Classroom, two widely used resources for parents and educators seeking practical, compassionate tools to better support neurodivergent kids.
Cindy has trained thousands of families and professionals through her Calm & Connected® workshops and certification programs for ADHD Parent Coaches and Teacher Trainers. Known for her clear, empathetic teaching style, she also serves on the Board of Directors for CHADD and the Editorial Advisory Board of Attention Magazine, continuing to advocate for greater awareness and more effective support across home and school settings.
BACKGROUND READING
Cindy's website, Facebook, LinkedIn, Instagram, YouTube, discount book order (while offer lasts), Free gift about how to support your child or teen.
The Neurodiversity Podcast is on Facebook, Instagram, BlueSky, and you're invited to join our Facebook Group. For more information go to www.NeurodiversityPodcast.com.
If you'd like members of your organization, school district, or company to know more about the subjects discussed on our podcast, Emily Kircher-Morris provides keynote addresses, workshops, and training sessions worldwide, in-person or virtually. You can choose from a list of established presentations, or work with Emily to develop a custom talk to fit your unique situation. To learn more, visit our website.

Episode 300! For decades, the standard response to challenging behavior has been simple: reward the good, punish the bad. But what if non-compliance isn't a sign of disrespect, but a signal of distress? Why do traditional behavioral frameworks like PBIS often miss the mark for neurodivergent students? And how can adults shift from being enforcers to problem-solving partners? Today, Emily Kircher-Morris talks with Dr. Ross Greene, author of The Explosive Child and the upcoming book The Kids Who Aren't Okay, and the originator of the Collaborative and Proactive Solutions (CPS) model, about the critical difference between modifying behavior and solving the problems that cause it.
Dr. Ross W. Greene is a clinical psychologist and the originator of Collaborative & Proactive Solutions (CPS), an innovative, evidence-based approach for supporting kids with concerning behaviors. He is the author of several influential books, including The Explosive Child, Lost at School, Lost & Found, Raising Human Beings, and his forthcoming title, The Kids Who Aren't Okay: The Urgent Case for Reimagining Support, Belonging, and Hope in Schools. He also developed and executive produced the award-winning 2018 documentary The Kids We Lose.
Dr. Greene is the founding director of the nonprofit Lives in the Balance and previously served on the faculty at Harvard Medical School for over 20 years. He is currently an adjunct professor at Virginia Tech and the University of Technology Sydney. His CPS model has been implemented in schools, inpatient units, and juvenile facilities across the globe, significantly reducing the use of punitive discipline and promoting connection, collaboration, and long-term success for kids.
BACKGROUND READING
Dr. Greene's website
For information about the variety of courses for teachers, parents, and mental health professionals through the Neurodiversity University, check the info page on our website.
The Neurodiversity Podcast is on Facebook, Instagram, BlueSky, and you're invited to join our Facebook Group. For more information go to www.NeurodiversityPodcast.com.
If you'd like members of your organization, school district, or company to know more about the subjects discussed on our podcast, Emily Kircher-Morris provides keynote addresses, workshops, and training sessions worldwide, in-person or virtually. You can choose from a list of established presentations, or work with Emily to develop a custom talk to fit your unique situation. To learn more, visit our website.

Emily Kircher-Morris chats today with Diane Dempster and Elaine Taylor-Klaus from Impact Parents, hosts of the Parenting with Impact podcast. They talk about the challenge of motivating neurodivergent kids, and break down why it's so challenging. The chat includes a framework called PINCH, a way to remember and think about important elements of motivation. You'll come away with practical strategies for parents to foster a supportive environment that encourages engagement, and ways to move away from fear and stress as motivators.
TAKEAWAYS
Traditional parenting advice often doesn't apply to neurodivergent kids.

Motivation can be misunderstood; it's not always lack of interest.

Executive functioning skills play a crucial role in motivation.

Dopamine is essential for engaging in non-preferred tasks.

Waiting until the last minute can be a legitimate strategy for motivation.

Fear-based parenting creates stress and is not sustainable.

Intrinsic motivation develops later in life, especially for neurodivergent individuals.

The PINCH framework helps identify different motivators for kids.

Novelty keeps the brain engaged and interested.

Competition can motivate but may also cause anxiety in some children.

Collaboration and connection with peers can enhance motivation.

Parents should experiment with different motivational strategies.

Transparency and vulnerability in parenting can build trust.

If you'd like members of your organization, school district, or company to know more about the subjects discussed on our podcast, Emily Kircher-Morris provides keynote addresses, workshops, and training sessions worldwide, in-person or virtually. You can choose from a list of established presentations, or work with Emily to develop a custom talk to fit your unique situation. To learn more, visit our website.
Elaine Taylor-Klaus and Diane Dempster co-founded ImpactParents.com in 2011 because traditional parenting advice wasn't working for their complex kids and they found no training or coaching available designed specifically to support them as parents of complex kids.
Internationally recognized as leading parent educators, they use a coach-approach to help parents reduce the stress of raising children, teens, and young adults with ADHD, Anxiety, Autism, LD and more. They're the creators of Sanity School® behavior training, and the authors of many books including Parenting ADHD Now: Easy Intervention Strategies to Empower Kids with ADHD and The Essential Guide to Raising Complex Kids with ADHD, Anxiety and More.
BACKGROUND READING
Impact Parents website, Parenting with Impact podcast, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter/X, LinkedIn
The Neurodiversity Podcast is on Facebook, Instagram, BlueSky, and you're invited to join our Facebook Group.

Many brilliant young people experience the dichotomy of disability layered on top of their intelligence. It's called twice-exceptionality, or 2e for short. What are the common misconceptions about twice-exceptional individuals? How do traditional models fall short when identifying the learning disabilities of our brightest kids? And why is early recognition so pivotal? Emily talks with Dr. Danika Maddocks, a psychologist, parent coach, and founder of the Gifted Learning Lab, about the intricacies of twice-exceptionality, in childhood and beyond. This is part of our end-of-year recap, and one of our most downloaded episodes.
For information about the variety of courses for teachers, parents, and mental health professionals through the Neurodiversity University, check the info page on our website.
Dr. Danika Maddocks is a psychologist, parent coach, and owner of The Gifted Learning Lab. She has supported gifted and twice-exceptional kids and their families for over 15 years as a teacher, therapist, school consultant, assessment provider, and coach. She has also published award-winning research on giftedness and twice-exceptionality. Much of her work is informed by her personal experiences growing up gifted and her experience raising a young gifted kid.
Here's a link to the free course about power struggles from Danika Maddocks.
BACKGROUND READING
Free email mini course, Reduce Power Struggles with Your Gifted/2e Kid, Facebook, Instagram
If you'd like members of your organization, school district, or company to know more about the subjects discussed on our podcast, Emily Kircher-Morris provides keynote addresses, workshops, and training sessions worldwide, in-person or virtually. You can choose from a list of established presentations, or work with Emily to develop a custom talk to fit your unique situation. To learn more, visit our website.
The Neurodiversity Podcast is on Facebook, Instagram, BlueSky, and you're invited to join our Facebook Group.