But Are You Happy?

You’ll want to send this episode to every friend who casually drops the phrase "I'm so depressed" when they're just having a bad day, or anyone trying to figure out where normal sadness ends and something much heavier begins.
Have you noticed how casually we throw around major mental health terms over coffee, accidentally minimizing a condition that deeply impacts both the brain and the body?
In this episode of But Are You Happy?, host Ashani Dante sits down with clinical psychologist Julie Chapman to explore the complex reality of depression. We go beyond the casual slang to uncover what it truly means.
Together, they discuss the danger of casual language and why confusing ordinary sadness with a clinical episode does a disservice to both. Julie breaks down why depression looks completely different from the outside depending on who is experiencing it, meaning those closest to you might only ever see the tiniest cracks. They look at how a major life shift, like a relationship breakdown or having children, can shatter the protective people-pleasing structures keeping our underlying pain at bay, while confronting the physical reality of mental illness to dismantle the myth that we are just heads on sticks.
The conversation also explores the relationship between our minds and bodies, challenging common assumptions about what a depressive episode looks like and offering practical insights into recognising a system failure before the spiral takes over.
Discover more Mamamia Podcasts here.
Watch But Are You Happy on YouTube. Follow us on Instagram here.
Feedback: podcast@mamamia.com.au
Share your story, feedback, or dilemma! Send us a voice message, and one of our Podcast Producers will get back to you ASAP.
Rate or review us on Apple by clicking on the three dots in the top right-hand corner, click Go To Show then scroll down to the bottom of the page, click on the stars at the bottom and write a review.
CREDITS:
Guest: Julie Chapman
Host: Ashani Dante
Senior Producer: Tahli Blackman
Group Executive Producer: Naima Brown
Audio and Video Producer: Marlena Cacciotti
Social Media Producer: Olivia Colman
If you want to support independent women's media, become a Mamamia subscriber. Get an all-access pass to everything we make, including exclusive podcasts, articles, videos and our exercise app, MOVE.

Mamamia acknowledges the Traditional Owners of the Land on which we have recorded this podcast.
Support the show: https://www.mamamia.com.au/mplus/
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Are you being "breadcrumbed" (do you even know what 'breadcrumbing" is?). Are you trapped in a loop of romantic ambiguity, where you're getting just enough intimacy to stay hooked, but left staring at your phone wondering if you're even allowed to call them when you're having a bad day?
In this episode of But Are You Happy, host Ashani Dante talks with clinical psychotherapist Sarah Bays to pull back the curtain on the confusing world of situationships. We’re moving beyond the surface level to explore the psychological tightrope of living in relational limbo, unpacking why we consistently compromise our own needs just to avoid the terrifying discomfort of real vulnerability.
Discover more Mamamia Podcasts here.
Watch But Are You Happy on YouTube. Follow us on Instagram here.
Feedback: podcast@mamamia.com.au
Share your story, feedback, or dilemma! Send us a voice message, and one of our Podcast Producers will get back to you ASAP.
Rate or review us on Apple by clicking on the three dots in the top right-hand corner, click Go To Show then scroll down to the bottom of the page, click on the stars at the bottom and write a review.
If you want to support independent women's media, become a Mamamia subscriber. Get an all-access pass to everything we make, including exclusive podcasts, articles, videos and our exercise app, MOVE.
CREDITS:
Host: Ashani Dante
Guest: Sarah Bays
Senior Producer: Tahli Blackman
Group Executive Producer: Naima Brown
Audio and Video Producer: Marlena Cacciotti
Social Media Producer: Olivia Colman
Mamamia acknowledges the Traditional Owners of the Land on which we have recorded this podcast.

Support the show: https://www.mamamia.com.au/mplus/
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You will want to send this episode to your husband, brother, boyfriend, son and all the men in your life.
Did you know that some online influencers use a rented facade of Lamborghinis and mansions just to trap young men into harmful algorithmic loops? Or have you noticed the boys in your life changing how they act the second they are in a group?
In this episode of But Are You Happy, host Ashani Dante sits down with guest Ben Vasilou, CEO of The Man Cave, to pull back the curtain on the rise of the manosphere and modern masculinity. We’re moving beyond the surface level to explore the real-world harm this toxic content has on young people and our personal relationships.
Together, they dive into how the manosphere operates as a lucrative business model targeting the isolation of young men, while sharing practical ways guys can find the courage to call out their mates' bad behaviour in everyday moments. The episode also addresses the heavy emotional burden of shame and fear that well-intentioned men carry, busting the myth of hyper-masculinity - proving these rigid stereotypes are just environmental conditioning, and that true masculinity is simply learning to be a good human being.
Discover more Mamamia Podcasts here.
Watch But Are You Happy? on YouTube. Follow us on Instagram here.
Feedback: podcast@mamamia.com.au
Share your story, feedback, or dilemma! Send us a voice message, and one of our Podcast Producers will get back to you ASAP.
Rate or review us on Apple by clicking on the three dots in the top right-hand corner, click Go To Show then scroll down to the bottom of the page, click on the stars at the bottom and write a review.
If you want to support independent women's media, become a Mamamia subscriber. Get an all-access pass to everything we make, including exclusive podcasts, articles, videos and our exercise app, MOVE.
CREDITS:
Host: Ashani Dante
Guest: Ben Vasilou
Senior Producer: Tahli Blackman
Group Executive Producer: Naima Brown
Audio and Video Producer: Marlena Cacciotti
Social Media Producer: Olivia Colman
Mamamia acknowledges the Traditional Owners of the Land on which we have recorded this podcast.
Support the show: https://www.mamamia.com.au/mplus/
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ever feel like staying up for hours perfecting a single email, or completely paralyzed by the fear of failing at a new project?
In this episode of But Are You Happy, host Ashani Dante pulls back the curtain on the sneaky reality of chronic perfectionism. We’re moving beyond the surface level to explore the inner turmoil and emotional load that comes with tying your entire self-worth to your performance. Joining the conversation is clinical psychologist Anita Shimmins from Inlight Psychology to unpack why we carry this deep underlying fear of failure and how it subtly infiltrates our work, our parenting, and our relationships.
Together, Ashani and Anita explore why perfectionism is actually a protective coping strategy built to shield us from shame. You will learn the distinct psychological archetypes of perfectionism, how chronic pressure can show up physically in the body, and why hitting a major life goal often brings a temporary wave of relief rather than true joy. More importantly, this episode breaks down actionable, evidence-based strategies from schema and exposure therapy, sharing how to actively test your fears by making small mistakes on purpose and how to start replacing unrelenting standards with a realistic, self-compassionate lens.
Discover more Mamamia Podcasts here.
Watch But Are You Happy? on YouTube. Follow us on Instagram here.
Feedback: podcast@mamamia.com.au
Share your story, feedback, or dilemma! Send us a voice message, and one of our Podcast Producers will get back to you ASAP.
Rate or review us on Apple by clicking on the three dots in the top right-hand corner, click Go To Show then scroll down to the bottom of the page, click on the stars at the bottom and write a review.
If you want to support independent women's media, become a Mamamia subscriber. Get an all-access pass to everything we make, including exclusive podcasts, articles, videos and our exercise app, MOVE.
CREDITS:
Host: Ashani Dante
Guest: Anita Shimmins
Senior Producer: Tahli Blackman
Group Executive Producer: Naima Brown
Audio and Video Producer: Marlena Cacciotti
Social Media Producer: Olivia Colman
Mamamia acknowledges the Traditional Owners of the Land on which we have recorded this podcast.
Support the show: https://www.mamamia.com.au/mplus/
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

A new season of But Are You Happy? Is coming your way. You told us you wanted deep-dive, informative conversations with leading experts about all the things impacting your self-development and mental health. We got you. You’ll be hearing from experts such as Sarah Bays, Millie Rose Bannister and Ben Vasilou, on topics ranging from situationships, navigating tricky group chats, and pushing back against perfectionism.
Same great show, new conversations.
Don’t forget to click “follow” [+] on your podcast app so you don’t miss a thing.
Support the show: https://www.mamamia.com.au/mplus/
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.